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50 Narcissist Quotes Funny Enough to Make You Laugh

Spot-on humor meets truth: 50 Sarcastic Narcissistic Humor quotes that perfectly capture their dramatic antics.

50 Narcissist Quotes Funny Enough to Make You Laugh by Som Dutt From Embrace Inner Chaos

Dealing with narcissists can drain your energy, but sometimes laughter truly becomes the best medicine. These 50 narcissist quotes funny enough to brighten your day capture the absurd reality of their behavior with sharp wit and humor. From their endless need for admiration to their Olympic-level mental gymnastics, these quotes nail exactly what makes narcissists both frustrating and unintentionally hilarious.

Whether you’re recovering from a toxic relationship or just need validation that you’re not imagining things, these quotes hit different. They transform those eye-rolling moments into genuine belly laughs. Each quote acts like a mirror reflecting their predictable patterns back with a comedic twist that helps you see the situation more clearly.

Humor helps you reclaim your power when dealing with difficult people. These quotes remind you that narcissistic behavior follows such predictable patterns that it becomes almost comical. You’ll find yourself nodding along, thinking “that’s exactly what they do!” while finally being able to laugh about it.

50 Narcissist Quotes Funny Enough to Make You Laugh

A collection of humorous observations about narcissism from comedians, authors, and entertainers

1

“A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.”

― Gore Vidal, Author
2

“Narcissist: psychoanalytic term for the person who loves himself more than his analyst; considered to be the manifestation of a dire mental disease whose successful treatment depends on the patient learning to love the analyst more and himself less.”

― Thomas Szasz, Psychiatrist
3

“I used to play a narcissistic conservative pundit. Now I’m just a narcissist.”

― Stephen Colbert, Comedian and TV Host
4

“Twitter is the marriage of full-tilt narcissism and full-tilt voyeurism that has finally collided in 140 words.”

― Adam Goldberg, Actor
5

“Narcissism is a fact of life… So being angry about the younger generation being ‘narcissistic,’ that’s like saying ‘Oh, this young generation only wants to poop in their diaper! They don’t want to use the bathroom!'”

― Adam Conover, Comedian
6

“I am a recovering narcissist. I thought narcissism was about self-love till someone told me there is a flip side to it. It is actually drearier than self-love; it is unrequited self-love.”

― Emily Levine, Humorist
7

“No one has probably helped me more with my narcissism than my dog.”

― Tucker Max, Author
8

“I’m definitely a narcissist, and TV is fabulous for narcissists.”

― Paulina Porizkova, Model and Author
9

“In true, narcissistic fashion, when my father was diagnosed as a narcissist, he called us all up individually to tell us, and he did it with true pride.”

― Neal Brennan, Comedian
10

“I love love. Every day of my life is Valentine’s Day. When you’re a pathological narcissist, you have to fall in love with yourself every day.”

― Katya Zamolodchikova, Comedian and Drag Performer
11

“I’ve had years of psychiatry… I ask, ‘I’m not an actual narcissist, am I?'”

― Rob Lowe, Actor
12

“One thing a narcissist doesn’t like is to look in a mirror that is in any way genuinely reflective of what’s on the other side of it.”

― Jay Parini, Poet and Novelist
13

“It would have been convenient to be gay. Just because of the grooming, the narcissism, stuff like that. But I have this kind of roaring heterosexuality.”

― Russell Brand, Comedian
14

“I love Twitter! At first I made fun of it, because it is very narcissistic, and there’s already so much narcissism flowing in this industry… But I really love the idea of the direct connection.”

― Kelly Clarkson, Singer
15

“I don’t know if it’s naivete or just narcissism, but I start out with this notion that I can do anything… and that, I think, is the secret to my success.”

― Michelle Pfeiffer, Actress
16

“I’m battling with keeping my narcissism at bay as it is, so Twitter was not a good thing for that.”

― Joel Kinnaman, Actor
17

“When I was really young, I wanted to grow up and be the sun. Which shows an early penchant for ambition or narcissism or grandiosity or delusion—bellwethers for becoming a writer.”

― Gayle Forman, Author
18

“Blogs are nothing more than a personal meandering diary for public consumption—a narcissist’s dream.”

― Carole Radziwill, Author and TV Personality
19

“‘Moving on’ is a concept invented by Housewives… To accept responsibility is simply too painful for this particular brand of narcissist.”

― Carole Radziwill, Author and TV Personality
20

“What is most difficult is when the large part of me that is a narcissist grows weary and is overtaken by the self-loathing part…”

― Greg Fitzsimmons, Comedian
21

“You do get a bit paranoid that you’re becoming a sort of narcissist, an artistic solipsist when you’re doing stand-up.”

― Tim Minchin, Comedian and Musician
22

“I’ve been asked many times if I considered myself a narcissist… and I came to the conclusion that indeed I am one.”

― Robbie Williams, Singer
23

“In an individualistic culture, the narcissist is God’s gift to the world. In a collectivist society, the narcissist is God’s gift to the collective.”

― Christopher Lasch, Historian
24

“The megalomaniac differs from the narcissist by the fact that he wishes to be powerful rather than charming, and seeks to be feared rather than loved.”

― Bertrand Russell, Philosopher
25

“You’re… buffeted by whatever some narcissist just posted on Instagram or some windbag on Twitter.”

― Antonio García Martínez, Author
26

“Being a full-time musician… it was sort of too much ‘me’ all the time. I felt like a bit of a narcissist.”

― Domino Kirke, Musician
27

“Everybody thinks I am a narcissist. I am actually the opposite of that.”

― Louis van Gaal, Football Manager
28

“People think I’m a complete narcissist, creeper vibes.”

― Tom Sandoval, TV Personality
29

“I’m an insane narcissist, so if I have to get something off my chest, I’ll get something off my chest.”

― Nate Ruess, Musician
30

“A blog like this is narcissism in its most obscene flowering.”

― Ayelet Waldman, Author
31

“There’s a degree of narcissism involved in anything in show business.”

― Stephen Colbert, Comedian and TV Host
32

“The narcissist act is not an act. I actually am a narcissist, very much so. My world revolves around me.”

― Tucker Max, Author
33

“I always call myself a recovering narcissist. I lived my life thinking everything was about me.”

― Fantastic Negrito, Musician
34

“My father was a textbook narcissist… He threatened the democracy of our family.”

― Randy Rainbow, Comedian
35

“When I was three… being the narcissist that I am, I ran him over with my tricycle.”

― Robson Green, Actor
36

“Call it egotistical or narcissist, but I think that’s what we all look for in books…”

― John Corey Whaley, Author
37

“Twitter was not a good thing for keeping my narcissism at bay.”

― Joel Kinnaman, Actor
38

“Narcissism… there’s already so much of it flowing in this industry.”

― Kelly Clarkson, Singer
39

“No one has probably helped me more with my narcissism than my dog.”

― Tucker Max, Author
40

“Narcissism is a natural part of your development… being mad about it is like being mad babies use diapers.”

― Adam Conover, Comedian
41

“Blogs… a narcissist’s dream. So when bloggers take themselves seriously, it’s super annoying.”

― Carole Radziwill, Author and TV Personality
42

“I’m definitely a narcissist… TV is fabulous for narcissists.”

― Paulina Porizkova, Model and Author
43

“I am a recovering narcissist… it is unrequited self-love.”

― Emily Levine, Humorist
44

“In true, narcissistic fashion, when my father was diagnosed as a narcissist… he did it with true pride.”

― Neal Brennan, Comedian
45

“A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.”

― Gore Vidal, Author
46

“There’s a degree of narcissism in anything in show business… Why would you want anybody to listen to you otherwise?”

― Stephen Colbert, Comedian and TV Host
47

“In an individualistic culture, the narcissist is God’s gift to the world.”

― Christopher Lasch, Historian
48

“The megalomaniac differs from the narcissist… he seeks to be feared rather than loved.”

― Bertrand Russell, Philosopher
49

“No one has helped my narcissism more than my dog.”

― Tucker Max, Author
50

“I tend to say a blog like mine is narcissism in its most obscene flowering.”

― Ayelet Waldman, Author

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