Does narcissism get worse with age? You might notice that people change as they grow older. Perhaps your parent becomes more sensitive or seeks more attention. Understanding these changes can help you support your loved ones.
Recent studies show:
Different types of narcissism decline at varying rates.
Life events and social roles contribute to a reduction in narcissistic traits over time.
Recognizing these patterns is crucial. You can demonstrate care and improve the situation for everyone involved.
Key Takeaways
Narcissism usually gets lower as people get older, even though many think it gets worse. Life changes, like having kids or starting a new job, can make people less narcissistic.
Older people often care more about friends and family than just themselves. Some people with power may keep some traits, but most people get nicer as they age.
If you notice signs of narcissism in older people, you can act kindly and set good boundaries.
Talking in ways that avoid fights over control can help you get along better with narcissistic people.
Taking care of yourself and asking for help is important for those who care for loved ones with narcissistic behavior.
Knowing that narcissism does not always get worse as people age can help you support those who deal with it.
Narcissism Get Worse With Age

Research Findings
You may wonder if narcissism gets worse as people age. Many people ask this because they see changes in themselves or others. Recent research says narcissism usually goes down or stays the same as people get older. It does not often get worse.
Let’s look at what studies found. Scientists watched people for many years to see how their personalities changed. One big study followed adults for 23 years. Most people became less narcissistic over time. People who started new families or steady jobs saw the biggest drops. Those with powerful jobs or unstable relationships saw smaller changes.
Did you know?
Some experts, like Dr. W. Keith Campbell, say that narcissism can make you feel confident, but too much can hurt your relationships as you get older.
Here is a table with the main findings:
Evidence Description | Findings |
---|---|
Studies on narcissism and age | Narcissism may go down with age because of changes in how people see themselves and their roles in society. |
Protective factors of narcissism | A little narcissism can help older adults feel less lonely and support their mental health. |
Need for further research | Scientists need more long-term studies to fully understand these changes. |
Meta-analyses split narcissism into different parts. Overt narcissism means showing off or wanting attention. Covert narcissism means feeling insecure or sensitive inside. Both types usually go down as you get older, but not at the same speed. Here is a summary from recent reviews:
Factor of Narcissism | Rank-Order Stability | |
---|---|---|
Agentic (outgoing, bold) | -0.28 | 0.73 |
Antagonistic (hostile) | -0.41 | 0.68 |
Neurotic (anxious) | -0.55 | 0.60 |
All three types drop over time. The numbers show the average change. A negative number means a decrease. The stability score shows that people who start out more narcissistic often stay higher than others, but everyone tends to go down.
Long-term studies show that people in leadership roles may keep some traits, like wanting to be in charge. If you have better health or unstable relationships, you might see smaller drops in some traits, like vanity.
Common Beliefs
Many people think narcissism gets worse with age. You might hear stories about older adults acting more self-centered or demanding. But what does science say?
Let’s compare common beliefs with research:
Evidence Description | Summary |
---|---|
Decline of Narcissism | Research shows all parts of narcissism go down as people age. |
Emotional Goals | Older adults focus more on close relationships, not just themselves. |
Consistency in Narcissism | If you were more narcissistic as a child, you may stay above average, but still go down. |
Altruistic Values | Many older adults become more giving and less self-focused. |
Increase in Certain Traits | Some people in power may show more selfishness or less empathy. |
Most people become less narcissistic, but some traits can stick around or even grow in special cases. For example, if someone gets a lot of power, they might act more selfish.
Here is another table with findings from recent studies:
Study Title | Findings |
---|---|
Study Shows Narcissism Declines with Age | People become less narcissistic from childhood to old age. Differences between people stay stable. |
Research tracks narcissism from young adulthood to middle age | Most people see a drop in narcissism as they mature, but some differences remain. |
So, does narcissism get worse with age? Most research says no. You will likely see the same or even lower levels of narcissism as you or your loved ones get older. Still, everyone is different. Life events, health, and social roles can change how these traits show up.
Younger vs. Older Adults

Traits in Youth
Younger adults often show both confidence and insecurity. Many young people think they are special or deserve more. They want extra attention or praise from others. Their self-esteem depends on what people say about them. If someone says something mean, they feel hurt inside. They might act tough, but they are upset.
These traits can help you grow during late adolescence. You might take risks and try new things. You may dream big and want to find your place. This is normal and helps you learn about yourself. Sometimes, these traits become too strong. You might know someone who always wants to win. They cannot handle losing or being wrong. They act important to hide their doubts. This makes it hard for them to make close friends.
Tip:
If someone acts proud or sensitive, they may be trying to protect themselves from feeling not good enough.
Here is a table that shows how narcissistic traits look in youth:
Trait | How It Shows Up in Youth | Possible Impact |
---|---|---|
Entitlement | Wants special treatment | Has trouble with rules or sharing |
Self-importance | Brags or shows off | Finds it hard to listen to others |
Contingent self-esteem | Gets upset by criticism | Mood swings, needs approval |
Defensive behavior | Denies mistakes, blames others | Struggles with honesty and growth |
Changes Over Time
As people get older, these traits usually change. Most become less focused on themselves and care more about others. They start to value close relationships and learn from mistakes. People often ask if narcissism get worse with age, but research says it does not.
Your level compared to others stays about the same.
If you had high narcissistic traits as a child, you keep that rank, but your traits still drop.
Why does this happen? Life teaches you lessons. You face problems and make friends. You take on new roles and see things from other views. You learn that listening and caring are important.
Here is a quick comparison:
Age Group | Common Traits | Social Focus |
---|---|---|
Youth | Entitlement, self-importance | Self, achievement |
Older Adults | Empathy, humility | Family, community |
Some people keep certain traits, but most see less self-centered behavior. You become more thoughtful and balanced as you age. This shows that narcissism get worse with age is not common. Instead, most people grow kinder and more understanding.
Signs in Older Adults
Noticing narcissistic traits in older adults can help you help them. You might see changes that are hard to understand or feel hurtful. Let’s talk about the most common signs and how they show up every day.
Sensitivity
Older adults with these traits often react strongly to criticism. They may get upset or angry if you question their choices. Sometimes, they refuse to admit mistakes or say they are always right. They might talk about things they did in the past to show their value. This can make talking with them stressful.
Imagine your father gets mad when you suggest a new idea. He says his way is best and talks about his old job. He avoids topics that make him feel less important.
You might also see they fear being left out. Some older adults want more of your attention. They want you to listen and admire them. If you spend time with others, they may feel ignored or left out.
Common signs of sensitivity in older adults:
Quick to anger when criticized
Rigid beliefs and behaviors
Frequent reminders of past successes
Fear of abandonment and need for reassurance
Attention Seeking
Attention seeking is another sign you might notice. Older adults with these traits often want praise and admiration. They may interrupt to talk about themselves or expect compliments. You might hear the same stories about their achievements many times.
Have you seen your grandmother always turn the talk to herself? She may talk about her looks or her job, hoping you will praise her.
Some older adults try to get all the attention at family events. They want to be the main person in every story. If someone else gets praise, they may feel jealous or try to do better.
Mental health professionals often report these behaviors:
Inflated sense of self-importance
Constant need for admiration
Preoccupation with power, fame, or beauty
Belief in being unique or special
Expectation of special treatment
Here’s a table comparing signs in youth and older adults:
Sign | Youth Example | Older Adult Example |
---|---|---|
Sensitivity | Upset by criticism from friends | Anger or withdrawal after feedback |
Attention Seeking | Bragging about grades or sports | Recalling past achievements |
Empathy Decline | Ignoring others’ feelings | Dismissing family members’ concerns |
Entitlement | Demanding special treatment at school | Expecting family to cater to needs |
Jealousy | Competing for teacher’s praise | Competing for attention at gatherings |
Empathy Decline
Empathy often goes down in older adults with these traits. You may see they have trouble understanding how others feel. They might ignore your feelings or not care about your worries. Sometimes, they seem cold or not interested when you share good news.
Recent studies show older adults with narcissistic personality disorder have trouble seeing emotions in others. They may not react to your happiness or sadness. Their responses can feel distant or even negative.
Study | Findings |
---|---|
Marissen, Deen, & Franken (2012) | Difficulty recognizing emotions from facial expressions |
Ritter et al. (2011) | Reduced empathic concern in emotional situations |
Fan et al. (2011) | Lower brain activation for empathy when viewing emotional faces |
Sylvers et al. (2008) | Negative reaction to others’ positive experiences |
Kelsey et al. (2001) | Less emotional response to aversive events |
You might feel sad when your loved one ignores your feelings. Remember, this lack of empathy is their struggle, not your fault.
If you see these signs, you can respond with patience and care. Knowing these patterns helps you set healthy boundaries and get support when you need it.
Influencing Factors
When people get older, their personality can change. Some traits go away, but some stay. Let’s look at what affects narcissistic traits in older adults.
Life Events
Life is full of changes. Big events can change how you act. Getting a new job or starting a family makes you think about others. Losing someone or going through hard times can make you less selfish.
Forming new relationships
Having new experiences
Starting a family
Landing a first job
Accepting feedback
Experiencing breakups
Facing tragedies
When you work or have a family, you learn to care for others. Listening to feedback helps you see your mistakes. Hard times can teach you to be kinder. Chopik says these moments help you change old habits. You learn that being selfish can hurt people close to you.
Life events are like mirrors. They help you see yourself and who you could be.
Health
Getting older changes your body and mind. Losing independence can make you feel weak. This can make narcissistic traits stronger.
Losing independence can make people feel upset.
Some people get angry or refuse help when they feel weak.
Ignoring doctors can make health worse.
Some skip doctor visits or do not listen to advice. Trying to control everything can cause stress. Stress can make you sick. These actions can lead to feeling lonely or sad. That can make health problems worse.
Health Factor | Impact on Narcissistic Traits |
---|---|
Loss of independence | May increase anger or resistance |
Can worsen health and isolation | |
High stress | Raises risk for health problems |
Social isolation | May lead to depression |
Social Changes
As people age, their social roles change. Retiring can make someone feel lost. If their job was important to them, leaving it can be hard. Some try to feel important at home or with friends.
Some look for new ways to feel special.
Living with others can make people act bossy.
Getting older can make people less grand. Changes in looks and status can hurt self-image. Sometimes, self-esteem drops a lot. Not all traits go away. Entitlement can stay or even get stronger. Friends and money can help people feel better.
Social Change | Possible Effect |
---|---|
Retirement | Loss of status, search for new roles |
Reduced social status | Lower self-image, less grandiosity |
Strong support network | Eases decline, encourages reflection |
Financial security | Reduces stress, supports adjustment |
So, does narcissism get worse with age? Most studies say no. But these things can change how traits show up. Some traits fade, but some stay or grow, depending on your life.
Recognizing and Responding
Warning Signs
How do you know when narcissistic traits show up more in older adults? You might see small changes first. These signs often happen during talks or family events. Watching closely helps you respond with care.
Look for these warning signs:
Reactivity to criticism:
You may notice quick, defensive reactions to feedback. Even soft advice can make them angry or hurt. It is like pressing a sore spot. Any pressure brings a strong response.Oppositionality:
Some older adults do not want advice or help. You might hear, “Don’t tell me what to do.” They may ignore helpful ideas. This pushback makes helping with daily things hard.Superficial empathy:
Their concern for others may seem fake. They say nice things, but soon talk about themselves. It is like watching someone act in a play. They know what to say, but do not feel it.
Tip:
If your words get ignored or twisted, you may be seeing these warning signs.
Seeing these patterns early helps you set good boundaries. You can protect yourself and still give support.
Communication
Talking with an older adult who has narcissistic traits can be tough. You want to help, but you do not want to fight. How can you keep things calm and share your thoughts?
Try these communication strategies:
Avoid engaging in power struggles:
Stay calm if talks get heated. Step back instead of arguing. This stops things from getting worse.Encourage healthy social connections:
Help your loved one meet friends or join groups. Social time can lower loneliness and self-centered actions.Recognize the impact of health issues:
Health problems can make narcissistic traits stronger. If you see changes, think about how pain or sickness may affect them.Manage expectations and foster compassion:
Change takes time. You may not see fast results. Be patient and kind to your loved one and yourself.Seek professional help when necessary:
If the behavior is too much, ask a counselor or doctor for help. Support can help everyone feel better.
Remember:
You cannot change someone right away. Small steps and steady support work best.
Clear, gentle talks help you build trust. You can keep your relationship strong, even when things are hard.
Relationships
Family Impact
Living with or caring for an older adult with narcissistic traits can be very hard. Family life might feel tense, like you are always worried about what will happen next. The way your loved one acts can affect everyone at home. Sometimes, it feels like there is always trouble in the air.
How does narcissism in older adults shape family relationships?
Narcissistic parents can lower their children’s self-worth and emotional stability.
Adult children often struggle with emotions and setting healthy boundaries.
Family dynamics may include scapegoating or unhealthy sibling competition, which can last into adulthood.
You might see one sibling get blamed for everything. Another sibling might get special treatment. This can make people feel upset and confused. Over time, these problems can make it hard to trust or get close to others.
Family Challenge | Possible Effect on You |
---|---|
Scapegoating | Feeling isolated or blamed |
Sibling rivalry | Competition instead of cooperation |
Emotional invalidation | Doubting your own feelings |
Lack of boundaries | Trouble saying “no” or asking for help |
Think of family life like a team sport. If one person keeps breaking the rules, the whole team has a hard time winning.
Coping
You may ask, “How do I protect myself and keep peace at home?” Dealing with narcissistic behavior takes time and practice. Here are some ways that help many families:
Use written communication to keep a record.
Keep conversations short and stick to facts.
Avoid getting pulled into drama or emotional traps.
Do not share personal feelings or private details.
Remind yourself not to take hurtful comments personally.
Treat interactions like business—set clear, strong boundaries.
These steps help you stay calm and feel more in control. You do not have to fix every problem. You can choose what you say and how you act.
Coping Strategy | Why It Works |
---|---|
Written communication | Creates a clear record |
Short, factual talks | Reduces emotional stress |
Strong boundaries | Protects your well-being |
Emotional distance | Keeps you from feeling overwhelmed |
Picture your boundaries like a strong fence. You get to decide what comes in and what stays out.
Support
Caring for someone with narcissistic traits can feel lonely sometimes. You need support, too. Many caregivers feel better when they focus on their own needs and ask for help.
Types of support you can use:
Self-care: Make time for sleep, exercise, healthy food, and relaxation.
Setting boundaries: Stay clear, firm, and consistent about what you will accept.
Professional help: Join support groups or talk to a therapist who understands family dynamics.
Financial resources: Look for programs that offer help to caregivers.
Support Option | Benefit for You |
---|---|
Self-care routines | Boosts energy and mood |
Support groups | Connects you with others who understand |
Therapy | Offers expert advice and coping tools |
Financial assistance | Reduces stress about caregiving costs |
Remember, you cannot help others if you do not take care of yourself first. Taking care of yourself makes it easier to care for others.
If you feel like it is too much, ask for help. You are not alone. Many families go through this, and there is support to help you feel better and find hope.
Myths vs. Reality
Facts
People talk a lot about narcissism and aging. Some say older adults always get more self-centered. Others think only young people act narcissistic. Let’s look at what is true and what is not.
Common Myths About Narcissism and Aging:
Narcissism always gets worse as you age.
Older adults become more demanding and less caring.
Young people are the most narcissistic generation ever.
Self-confidence or wanting attention means someone is a narcissist.
Narcissists lose all their traits as they get older.
Did you ever wonder if these ideas are true? Most are not.
Here’s what research actually shows:
People use “narcissism” for many bad behaviors, not just the disorder.
Feeling proud or wanting attention does not mean you are a narcissist.
A study found only 3.2% of people over 65 have extreme narcissism. For ages 20-29, it is 9.4%. This shows narcissism does not always grow with age.
Some experts do not agree with these numbers. You should not say one age group is more narcissistic than another.
Narcissistic traits can change as people get older. Some traits fade, but main tendencies often stay. Older adults may act differently, but the root traits remain.
Myths vs. Facts Table
Myth | Fact | Peer-Reviewed Source |
---|---|---|
Narcissism always gets worse with age | Most studies show narcissism declines or stays stable as you age | Oltmanns et al., 2014; NIH, 2020 |
Only young people are narcissistic | Older adults can show narcissism, but rates are lower than in youth | Foster et al., 2003 |
Self-confidence means narcissism | Confidence and empathy are not signs of narcissism | Twenge & Campbell, 2009 |
Narcissists lose all traits as they age | Core traits may adapt, but often remain in some form | Ronningstam, 2016 |
Millennials are the most narcissistic generation | Statistics do not support this stereotype; differences are small and debated | Roberts et al., 2010 |
Note: You can find more details in peer-reviewed journals like the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
Outlook
What happens as people with narcissistic traits get older? The answer is not simple. Some things change, but the main traits often stay.
Many older adults with narcissistic traits feel lonely or sad. They may miss getting attention from others.
Relationships can get harder. It is tough for them to keep friends as charm fades.
Big life changes, like retirement or health problems, can make behaviors worse. Some blame others or want more attention.
Money problems can happen. Spending too much or trying to impress others can leave little for later years.
Some older adults act more extreme. You might see more anger, suspicion, or sadness.
Think of narcissism like a tree. The branches may change shape, but the roots often stay deep.
Key Points for You:
Narcissism does not always get worse with age, but it can look different.
Do not expect a full change, especially if these traits have been there for years.
If you care for someone with narcissistic behavior, set healthy boundaries and take care of yourself.
If someone is abusive, do not wait for change. Get help and keep yourself safe.
Quick Reference Table: Aging and Narcissism
Change with Age | What You Might See | What to Do |
---|---|---|
More isolation, bitterness | Offer support, set boundaries | |
Relationship issues | Fewer friends, more conflict | Encourage healthy connections |
Financial problems | Less savings, risky spending | Seek advice, monitor finances |
Extreme behaviors | More anger, paranoia, or sadness | Get professional help if needed |
Remember, you can help your loved one, but you cannot change deep-rooted traits by yourself. Stay informed, stay safe, and ask for help when you need it.
Conclusion
You have learned that narcissism does not usually get worse as people age. Most older adults see these traits go down or stay the same. Sometimes, they feel lonely or lose confidence as narcissism drops. If you notice someone is sad or has weak relationships, it is a good idea to ask for help from a professional.
Key Finding | Implication |
---|---|
Narcissism decreases with age | Older adults might feel lonely or sad |
Lower narcissism, less confidence | They may spend more time alone and pull away from others |
Higher risk for depression | This can cause problems with feelings and health |
Tips for caregivers and families:
Take care of yourself so you stay healthy.
Ask for help from counselors or support groups.
Make clear rules for yourself and be proud of small steps.
Talk to experts if you see big changes in emotions.
You can help your loved one and yourself by learning more, making clear rules, and getting help when you need it.
Transform your Inner Chaos into authentic personal growth!
Stay informed on the latest research advancements covering:
Co-Parenting With A Narcissist
Frequently Asked Questions
Can someone become more narcissistic as they age?
Most people do not become more narcissistic with age. Research shows these traits usually decrease or stay the same. Life changes, like retirement or illness, can affect how these traits appear.
How can you spot narcissism in older adults?
Look for these signs:
Quick anger at criticism
Constant need for praise
Ignoring others’ feelings
Talking mostly about themselves
These patterns often stand out in daily conversations.
Is narcissism the same as self-confidence?
No, narcissism and self-confidence are different. You can feel good about yourself and still care about others. Narcissism often means you ignore others’ needs and want special treatment.
Can therapy help older adults with narcissistic traits?
Yes, therapy can help. A trained therapist teaches new ways to handle feelings and relationships. You may see small changes over time. Support from family and friends also matters.
What should you do if a loved one’s narcissism hurts you?
Set clear boundaries. Use short, calm talks. Protect your feelings. If things get too hard, ask a counselor for help. Remember, you deserve respect and support.
Are there any benefits to having some narcissistic traits?
A little narcissism can boost your confidence and help you handle stress. It may help you feel less lonely. Too much, though, can harm your relationships.
Do all older adults lose their narcissistic traits?
Not everyone loses these traits. Some people keep them for life. Big life events or health changes can make traits stronger or weaker. Each person’s journey looks different.