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The Narcissist’s Worst Nightmare: Your Unshakeable Self-Worth

Cultivate Unshakeable Self-worth To Disarm Narcissists

Gambling Addiction: Types Of Addictive Behaviors Explained by Som Dutt From https://embraceinnerchaos.com

Last updated on December 18th, 2024 at 03:51 am

In a world where narcissism seems to be on the rise, it’s crucial to understand the power of self-worth. Did you know that studies suggest up to 6.2% of the population may have narcissistic personality disorder? That’s a staggering number, and it doesn’t even account for those who exhibit narcissistic traits without meeting the full diagnostic criteria.

But here’s the thing: narcissists thrive on the insecurities of others. They feed off the doubt and self-loathing that many people carry within themselves. So what happens when they encounter someone with unshakeable self-worth? It’s like kryptonite to their Superman complex.

This isn’t just about standing up to narcissists, though. It’s about reclaiming your power, healing from past wounds, and building a foundation of self-love that can weather any storm. Whether you’ve experienced narcissistic abuse or simply want to fortify your sense of self, this journey is for you.

Empower yourself with unshakeable self-worth, the ultimate defense against a narcissist’s worst nightmare, and learn how to thrive beyond toxic dynamics.

1. Understanding Narcissism: The Enemy of Self-Worth

Before we can fully appreciate the power of self-worth, it’s essential to understand the nature of narcissism. This personality trait, which can range from mild to severe, is characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance and a deep need for excessive attention and admiration.

1.1 The Narcissistic Personality: Traits and Behaviors

Narcissists often exhibit a range of behaviors that can be damaging to those around them. They may:

– Constantly seek attention and praise
– Lack empathy for others’ feelings
– Exploit others for personal gain
– React with rage or contempt to criticism

These traits can make relationships with narcissists challenging and often toxic. It’s important to recognize the telltale traits of a narcissist to protect yourself from potential harm.

1.2 The Impact of Narcissism on Relationships

Narcissistic behavior can have a profound impact on personal and professional relationships. In romantic partnerships, narcissists may:

– Gaslight their partners
– Engage in emotional manipulation
– Constantly shift blame onto others

If you suspect you might be dating a narcissist, it’s crucial to be aware of the signs and take steps to protect your emotional well-being.

1.3 The Narcissism Epidemic in Modern Society

Some researchers argue that we’re experiencing a narcissism epidemic in modern society. Social media, self-promotion culture, and changing parenting styles may all contribute to this trend. Understanding how self-obsession is reshaping society can help us navigate these challenges more effectively.

1.4 Narcissistic Personality Disorder: When Narcissism Becomes Clinical

While many people exhibit narcissistic traits, Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a clinical diagnosis. NPD is characterized by a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and lack of empathy. For a comprehensive understanding of this condition, check out this guide to Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

2. The Power of Self-Worth: Your Ultimate Defense

Now that we’ve explored the nature of narcissism, let’s dive into the concept of self-worth and why it’s so crucial in dealing with narcissistic individuals.

2.1 Defining Self-Worth: More Than Just Self-Esteem

Self-worth goes beyond mere self-esteem. It’s a deep-seated belief in your inherent value as a person, regardless of external achievements or others’ opinions. Unlike self-esteem, which can fluctuate based on circumstances, self-worth remains constant.

2.2 The Building Blocks of Unshakeable Self-Worth

Developing unshakeable self-worth involves:

– Self-acceptance
– Setting healthy boundaries
– Practicing self-compassion
– Recognizing your intrinsic value

These elements form the foundation of a strong sense of self that can withstand narcissistic manipulation.

2.3 Self-Worth vs. Narcissistic Supply: Breaking the Cycle

Narcissists rely on external validation, or “narcissistic supply,” to maintain their inflated self-image. In contrast, individuals with strong self-worth don’t need constant external approval. This fundamental difference is why self-worth is such a powerful defense against narcissistic manipulation.

2.4 The Ripple Effect: How Self-Worth Impacts All Areas of Life

When you develop unshakeable self-worth, it positively impacts every aspect of your life. From improved relationships to increased resilience in the face of challenges, the benefits are far-reaching and transformative.

3. Recognizing Narcissistic Abuse: The First Step to Healing

Before we can fully embrace our self-worth, it’s crucial to recognize and understand narcissistic abuse. This awareness is the first step towards healing and reclaiming our power.

3.1 The Subtle Signs of Narcissistic Abuse

Narcissistic abuse isn’t always obvious. It can be insidious and gradual, slowly eroding your sense of self. Some hidden signs of narcissistic abuse include:

– Constant criticism disguised as “jokes”
– Gaslighting and reality distortion
– Intermittent reinforcement (hot and cold behavior)
– Isolation from friends and family

Recognizing these signs is crucial for breaking free from the cycle of abuse.

3.2 The Psychological Impact of Narcissistic Abuse

Narcissistic abuse can have profound and lasting effects on mental health. Victims may experience:

– Chronic anxiety and depression
– Low self-esteem and self-doubt
– Complex PTSD
– Difficulty trusting others

Understanding the long-term effects of narcissistic abuse is essential for healing and recovery.

3.3 Breaking the Silence: The Importance of Acknowledging Abuse

Many victims of narcissistic abuse struggle to acknowledge their experiences. This denial can stem from shame, self-doubt, or fear. However, breaking the silence is a crucial step towards healing and reclaiming your self-worth.

Narcissistic abuse often goes hand-in-hand with codependency. Understanding the toxic attraction between narcissism and codependency can help break free from this harmful dynamic.

4. Building Unshakeable Self-Worth: Strategies and Techniques

Now that we’ve explored the nature of narcissism and its impact, let’s focus on practical strategies for building unshakeable self-worth.

The Narcissist's Worst Nightmare: Your Unshakeable Self-Worth
-By Som Dutt from https://embraceinnerchaos.com
The Narcissist’s Worst Nightmare: Your Unshakeable Self-Worth
-By Som Dutt from https://embraceinnerchaos.com

4.1 Self-Reflection and Self-Discovery: Getting to Know Yourself

The journey to unshakeable self-worth begins with self-reflection. Take time to explore your values, passions, and personal strengths. This self-discovery process helps build a strong foundation for self-worth.

4.2 Challenging Negative Self-Talk: Rewriting Your Inner Narrative

Negative self-talk can be a major obstacle to self-worth. Practice identifying and challenging these thoughts. Replace them with more balanced, compassionate self-statements.

4.3 Setting and Enforcing Boundaries: Protecting Your Self-Worth

Healthy boundaries are crucial for maintaining self-worth, especially when dealing with narcissistic individuals. Learn to set and enforce boundaries that protect your emotional well-being.

4.4 Cultivating Self-Compassion: Being Your Own Best Friend

Self-compassion involves treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you’d offer a good friend. This practice can significantly boost your sense of self-worth and resilience.

5. The Narcissist’s Kryptonite: How Self-Worth Disarms Manipulation

Unshakeable self-worth is like kryptonite to a narcissist’s manipulative tactics. Let’s explore why and how this works.

5.1 The Power Shift: From Victim to Empowered Individual

When you develop strong self-worth, you shift from being a potential victim to an empowered individual. This transformation fundamentally changes the dynamic between you and the narcissist.

5.2 Immune to Gaslighting: Trusting Your Own Reality

Gaslighting is a common tactic used by narcissists to manipulate others. However, when you have a strong sense of self-worth, you’re more likely to trust your own perceptions and experiences, making gaslighting ineffective.

5.3 Resisting Love Bombing: Recognizing False Affection

Love bombing is another manipulation tactic often used by narcissists. With strong self-worth, you’re better equipped to recognize genuine affection from manipulative flattery.

5.4 Breaking Free from the Narcissistic Cycle: The Ultimate Act of Self-Worth

Ultimately, unshakeable self-worth gives you the strength to break free from narcissistic abuse. It empowers you to walk away from toxic relationships and prioritize your well-being.

6. Healing and Recovery: Rebuilding Self-Worth After Narcissistic Abuse

If you’ve experienced narcissistic abuse, rebuilding your self-worth is a crucial part of the healing process. Here’s how to start:

6.1 Acknowledging the Abuse: The First Step to Healing

Recognizing and acknowledging the abuse you’ve experienced is the first step towards healing. It’s okay to feel a range of emotions during this process. Remember, there are many signs of narcissistic abuse, and your experiences are valid.

6.2 Seeking Professional Help: The Role of Therapy in Recovery

Professional therapy can be invaluable in recovering from narcissistic abuse. A therapist can provide support, guidance, and tools to help you process your experiences and rebuild your self-worth.

6.3 Self-Care Practices: Nurturing Your Self-Worth Daily

Engaging in regular self-care is crucial for maintaining and boosting self-worth. This can include physical self-care, emotional self-care, and activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.

6.4 Building a Support Network: The Power of Healthy Relationships

Surrounding yourself with supportive, empathetic individuals can significantly aid your recovery. These relationships can help reinforce your self-worth and provide a contrast to narcissistic behavior.

7. Maintaining Self-Worth in a World of Narcissism

As we navigate a world where narcissistic behavior seems increasingly common, maintaining our self-worth becomes even more crucial.

7.1 Recognizing Narcissistic Behavior in Everyday Life

Being able to spot narcissistic behavior in various contexts can help protect your self-worth. Learn to recognize the signs that you’re dealing with a narcissist in personal and professional settings.

The Narcissist's Worst Nightmare: Your Unshakeable Self-Worth
-By Som Dutt from https://embraceinnerchaos.com
The Narcissist’s Worst Nightmare: Your Unshakeable Self-Worth
-By Som Dutt from https://embraceinnerchaos.com

7.2 Navigating Social Media: Protecting Your Self-Worth Online

Social media can be a breeding ground for narcissistic behavior. Be mindful of how your online interactions affect your self-worth, and don’t hesitate to set boundaries or take breaks when needed.

7.3 Workplace Strategies: Maintaining Self-Worth in Professional Settings

Narcissistic behavior can be particularly challenging in the workplace. Develop strategies to maintain your professional boundaries and self-worth, even when dealing with difficult colleagues or superiors.

7.4 Teaching Self-Worth: Raising the Next Generation

If you’re a parent or educator, you play a crucial role in fostering self-worth in the next generation. Focus on praising effort over achievement and encouraging self-reflection and self-acceptance.

8. The Ripple Effect: How Your Self-Worth Impacts Others

Your journey to unshakeable self-worth doesn’t just benefit you—it can have a profound impact on those around you.

8.1 Leading by Example: Inspiring Others Through Self-Worth

When you embody strong self-worth, you become a living example for others. Your confidence and self-respect can inspire those around you to cultivate their own sense of self-worth.

8.2 Creating Healthier Relationships: The Power of Mutual Respect

Strong self-worth allows you to engage in healthier, more balanced relationships. You’re more likely to attract and maintain connections based on mutual respect and genuine affection.

8.3 Breaking Generational Patterns: Healing Family Dynamics

By developing strong self-worth, you can help break generational patterns of narcissistic abuse or low self-esteem within your family.




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Frequently Asked Questions

How Does Unshakeable Self-Worth Protect Against Narcissistic Abuse?

Unshakeable self-worth acts as a powerful shield against narcissistic manipulation and emotional abuse. When you have a strong sense of self-value, you’re less likely to fall victim to a narcissist’s tactics of devaluation and gaslighting. This inner strength allows you to maintain your boundaries and recognize manipulative behaviors more easily.

Psychology Today explains that individuals with high self-esteem are more resilient to narcissistic abuse, as they’re less likely to seek validation from external sources, including manipulative partners or family members. By maintaining a strong sense of self, you become less susceptible to the emotional manipulation that narcissists often employ to control their victims.

What Are The Key Strategies For Building Unshakeable Self-Worth After Narcissistic Abuse?

Building unshakeable self-worth after narcissistic abuse involves several key strategies. First, practice self-compassion and acknowledge that the abuse was not your fault. Engage in positive self-talk and affirmations to counteract the negative messages internalized during the abusive relationship. Set and maintain firm boundaries in all relationships, and pursue personal goals and interests to rediscover your identity outside of the abusive dynamic.

Psych Central recommends seeking professional therapy, particularly trauma-informed approaches, to process the abuse and rebuild self-esteem. Remember that healing is a journey, and it’s okay to take it one step at a time. Focus on small, achievable goals and celebrate your progress along the way to reinforce your growing sense of self-worth.

How Can One Recognize Covert Narcissism In Relationships?

Recognizing covert narcissism can be challenging as it’s often more subtle than overt narcissism. Covert narcissists may present themselves as shy, sensitive, or even self-deprecating, but underneath lies a sense of superiority and entitlement. They often play the victim, use passive-aggressive tactics, and engage in emotional manipulation.

Pay attention to patterns of behavior where they consistently put their needs first, struggle with empathy, and become defensive when criticized. The National Domestic Violence Hotline advises looking out for signs like subtle put-downs, guilt-tripping, and a tendency to withdraw affection as punishment. Trust your instincts and be aware of how you feel in their presence, as covert narcissists often leave their partners feeling confused, anxious, or inadequate.

What Role Does Genetic Predisposition Play In Narcissistic Personality Disorder?

The role of genetics in Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is complex and not fully understood. Research suggests that there is likely a genetic component to narcissism, but it’s not a simple case of inheriting the disorder directly. Studies have shown that personality traits associated with narcissism, such as grandiosity and lack of empathy, may have a heritable component.

However, environmental factors, including childhood experiences and cultural influences, play a significant role in the development of NPD. The American Journal of Psychiatry reports that while there may be a genetic predisposition, it’s the interaction between genetic vulnerability and environmental factors that typically leads to the manifestation of narcissistic traits or NPD. This interplay between nature and nurture underscores the complexity of the disorder’s origins.

How Can Parents Protect Their Children From Developing Narcissistic Traits?

Parents can play a crucial role in preventing the development of narcissistic traits in their children. Encourage empathy by modeling compassionate behavior and discussing others’ feelings. Praise effort and character rather than innate qualities to foster a growth mindset, and set consistent boundaries and consequences to teach respect for others.

Avoid excessive praise or criticism, instead offering balanced and realistic feedback. Child Mind Institute emphasizes the importance of nurturing emotional intelligence and teaching children to value relationships and cooperation over constant self-promotion and competition. By creating a supportive environment that values empathy, hard work, and healthy relationships, parents can help their children develop a balanced sense of self-worth.

What Are The Most Effective Communication Strategies When Dealing With A Narcissist?

Effective communication with a narcissist requires a strategic approach. Use clear, concise language and avoid emotional reactions that can be exploited. Implement the “gray rock” method by keeping responses neutral and uninteresting to avoid feeding their need for drama. Set and maintain firm boundaries, clearly stating consequences for boundary violations.

Use “I” statements to express your feelings without attacking, which can trigger defensiveness. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) suggests documenting interactions and seeking support from trusted friends or professionals to maintain perspective and emotional balance when communicating with a narcissist. Remember that your goal is to protect your own well-being, not to change the narcissist’s behavior.

How Does Narcissistic Abuse Differ In Family Relationships Versus Intimate Partnerships?

Narcissistic abuse in family relationships often involves long-standing patterns of manipulation, often rooted in childhood dynamics. It may include scapegoating, golden child treatment, and emotional neglect. In intimate partnerships, narcissistic abuse tends to follow a cycle of idealization, devaluation, and discard.

Family abuse may be more subtle and normalized, while partner abuse can escalate to more overt control tactics. The American Psychological Association notes that family narcissistic abuse can have profound effects on personal identity formation, while partner abuse often impacts adult attachment styles and future relationship patterns. Both types of abuse can lead to long-lasting emotional scars, but the context and dynamics of the relationship shape the specific manifestations of the abuse.

What Are The Long-Term Psychological Effects Of Narcissistic Abuse?

The long-term psychological effects of narcissistic abuse can be profound and far-reaching. Survivors often struggle with complex PTSD, anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. Trust issues and difficulty in forming healthy relationships are common, as are a distorted sense of reality due to gaslighting, leading to self-doubt and indecisiveness.

Chronic stress from abuse can lead to physical health problems. The Journal of Clinical Psychology reports that narcissistic abuse can fundamentally alter one’s worldview and sense of self, requiring extensive therapy and self-work to overcome. Recovery often involves rebuilding one’s identity, learning to trust one’s perceptions, and developing healthy coping mechanisms.

How Can One Establish Healthy Boundaries With A Narcissistic Family Member?

Establishing healthy boundaries with a narcissistic family member is crucial for mental health and well-being. Start by clearly defining your limits and communicating them assertively. Be prepared for pushback and remain firm in your stance. Limit contact if necessary and avoid sharing sensitive information that can be used against you.

Practice emotional detachment techniques to reduce the impact of manipulative behaviors. The Family Institute at Northwestern University recommends seeking family therapy or individual counseling to develop strategies specific to your family dynamics and to process the emotional challenges of setting boundaries with narcissistic relatives. Remember that it’s okay to prioritize your own well-being, even if it means creating distance from toxic family relationships.

What Are The Signs That Someone Is Healing From Narcissistic Abuse?

Signs of healing from narcissistic abuse include increased self-awareness and the ability to recognize manipulative behaviors. Survivors often report feeling more confident in setting and maintaining boundaries. There’s typically a reduction in anxiety and hypervigilance as the nervous system begins to regulate.

Improved self-esteem and a stronger sense of personal identity emerge. The International Society for Traumatic Stress Studies notes that healing is often marked by a renewed interest in personal goals and relationships, as well as the ability to trust one’s own perceptions and judgments again. As healing progresses, survivors may find themselves more capable of forming healthy relationships and pursuing their own aspirations without fear of judgment or retribution.

How Does Narcissistic Abuse Impact Children And Their Development?

Narcissistic abuse can have severe impacts on children’s development. It often leads to attachment issues, low self-esteem, and difficulty trusting others. Children may develop people-pleasing behaviors or, conversely, struggle with authority figures. They’re at higher risk for anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues.

Long-term effects can include difficulty forming healthy relationships and a distorted sense of self. The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry emphasizes the importance of early intervention and therapy to mitigate these developmental impacts and help children build resilience. With proper support and guidance, children can learn to overcome the effects of narcissistic abuse and develop healthier patterns of behavior and self-perception.

What Role Does Gaslighting Play In Narcissistic Abuse, And How Can It Be Recognized?

Gaslighting is a central tactic in narcissistic abuse, used to manipulate victims into questioning their own reality. It involves denying or distorting events, trivializing emotions, and shifting blame. Recognizing gaslighting involves trusting your perceptions, keeping records of events, and noticing patterns of dismissal or contradiction.

Victims often feel confused, anxious, and unable to trust their own judgment. The National Domestic Violence Hotline advises seeking external validation from trusted sources and maintaining connections outside the abusive relationship to combat the effects of gaslighting. By learning to recognize gaslighting tactics, victims can begin to reclaim their sense of reality and build confidence in their own perceptions.

How Can Mindfulness Practices Aid In Recovery From Narcissistic Abuse?

Mindfulness practices can be powerful tools in recovering from narcissistic abuse. They help ground individuals in the present moment, reducing anxiety about the past or future. Mindfulness meditation can aid in emotional regulation and increase self-awareness, helping survivors reconnect with their authentic selves.

These practices can also help in recognizing and processing emotions without judgment. The American Mindfulness Research Association reports that regular mindfulness practice can reduce symptoms of PTSD and improve overall well-being in survivors of emotional abuse. By cultivating a non-judgmental awareness of their thoughts and feelings, survivors can develop greater emotional resilience and a stronger sense of self.

What Are The Most Common Manipulative Strategies Used By Narcissists, And How Can They Be Countered?

Narcissists employ various manipulative strategies, including love bombing, gaslighting, projection, and triangulation. They often use guilt, shame, and fear to control their victims. Countering these tactics involves educating oneself about narcissistic behaviors, maintaining strong boundaries, and developing emotional resilience.

Practice assertive communication and avoid engaging in arguments or justifying yourself. The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence recommends building a support network and seeking professional help to develop personalized strategies for dealing with narcissistic manipulation. By understanding these tactics and developing a strong sense of self, survivors can better protect themselves from narcissistic abuse.

How Does Narcissistic Abuse Differ From Other Forms Of Emotional Abuse?

Narcissistic abuse is distinct in its focus on control, exploitation, and the narcissist’s need for admiration and superiority. Unlike other forms of emotional abuse, it often involves cycles of idealization and devaluation, as well as a profound lack of empathy. Narcissistic abusers are more likely to use sophisticated manipulation tactics and may appear charming to outsiders.

The American Psychological Association notes that narcissistic abuse can be particularly damaging due to its insidious nature and the abuser’s ability to make the victim question their own worth and reality. The alternating praise and criticism can create a powerful trauma bond, making it difficult for victims to recognize the abuse and leave the relationship.

What Are The Key Components Of A Healing Journey After Narcissistic Abuse?

The healing journey after narcissistic abuse typically involves several key components. These include establishing safety and stability, processing trauma, rebuilding self-esteem, and developing healthy coping mechanisms. Education about narcissistic abuse and its effects is crucial, as is therapy, particularly modalities like EMDR or CBT.

Self-care practices, boundary setting, and reconnecting with personal values and goals are also essential. The National Center for PTSD emphasizes the importance of a holistic approach to healing, addressing both psychological and physical well-being. Recovery is a gradual process that requires patience, self-compassion, and often the support of trained professionals and understanding loved ones.

How Can One Identify A Covert Narcissist In Professional Settings?

Identifying a covert narcissist in professional settings can be challenging due to their subtle tactics. Look for patterns of passive-aggressive behavior, subtle put-downs, and a tendency to take credit for others’ work while deflecting blame. They may present as perfectionists or martyrs, often complaining about lack of recognition.

Pay attention to how they react to feedback or perceived slights. The Society for Human Resource Management advises professionals to document interactions and focus on performance-based evaluations to address covert narcissistic behavior in the workplace. By maintaining clear communication and professional boundaries, colleagues can protect themselves from the manipulative tactics of covert narcissists in the workplace.

What Are The Unique Challenges Faced By Children Of Narcissistic Parents In Adulthood?

Adult children of narcissistic parents often face unique challenges, including difficulty with self-identity, perfectionism, and people-pleasing tendencies. They may struggle with setting boundaries, experience imposter syndrome, or have trouble recognizing healthy relationships. Many grapple with unresolved trauma and may unconsciously seek out narcissistic partners.

The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy highlights the importance of therapy in addressing these challenges, particularly in breaking generational patterns and developing healthy self-esteem. Through therapy and self-work, adult children of narcissists can learn to recognize and change unhealthy patterns, develop a stronger sense of self, and cultivate healthier relationships.

How Does Cultural Context Influence The Expression And Recognition Of Narcissistic Traits?

Cultural context significantly influences both the expression and recognition of narcissistic traits. In individualistic cultures, overt displays of grandiosity may be more common, while collectivist cultures might see more covert forms of narcissism. Cultural norms around authority, family dynamics, and gender roles can affect how narcissistic behaviors are perceived and tolerated.

The Journal of Cross-Cultural Psychology emphasizes the importance of cultural competence in diagnosing and treating narcissistic personality disorder, as well as in recognizing and addressing narcissistic abuse across different cultural contexts. Understanding these cultural nuances is crucial for mental health professionals and individuals alike in identifying and addressing narcissistic behaviors within their specific cultural framework.

What Are The Most Effective Therapeutic Approaches For Healing From Narcissistic Abuse?

Several therapeutic approaches have shown effectiveness in healing from narcissistic abuse. Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) helps in restructuring negative thought patterns and developing coping strategies. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) can be beneficial for processing trauma, while Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) aids in emotional regulation and interpersonal effectiveness.

Some survivors find relief through somatic therapies that address the physical manifestations of trauma. The American Psychological Association recommends a trauma-informed approach, often combining multiple modalities tailored to the individual’s specific needs and experiences. The most effective treatment plan is often personalized, taking into account the individual’s unique experiences, cultural background, and personal goals for healing.

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About the Author :

Som Dutt, Top writer in Philosophy & Psychology on Medium.com. I make people Think, Relate, Feel & Move. Let's Embrace Inner Chaos and Appreciate Deep, Novel & Heavy Thoughts.

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