Last updated on September 2nd, 2024 at 09:07 pm
- What is Narcissistic Guilt-Tripping?
- 27 Sneaky Guilt Trips Narcissists Use
- Why Guilt-Tripping Can Be Hard to Spot
- How Guilt-Tripping Benefits the Narcissist
- Signs You’re Being Guilt-Tripped
- How to Respond to Narcissistic Guilt-Tripping
- The Emotional Toll of Narcissistic Guilt-Tripping
- When Guilt-Tripping Meets Gaslighting
- How Narcissists Weaponize Your Conscience
- Are You Trapped in a Narcissist’s Guilt Web?
- From Love to Guilt: Navigating a Narcissist’s Emotional Minefield
- The Guilt Trap: How Narcissists Keep You Coming Back for More
- Final Thoughts: Breaking Free from Narcissistic Guilt
Do you often feel guilty in your relationships, even when you haven’t done anything wrong? Does someone in your life make you feel bad about yourself constantly? You may be dealing with a narcissist who uses guilt as a weapon.
Guilt can be a powerful tool in the hands of a narcissist. They use it to make you feel awful about yourself and bend to their will. This sneaky tactic is called guilt-tripping, and it’s one of a narcissist’s favorite ways to manipulate and control others.
In this post, we’ll dive deep into the world of narcissistic guilt-tripping. You’ll learn how to spot it, why narcissists do it, and most importantly – how to protect yourself. Get ready to unmask the narcissist’s favorite weapon and break free from toxic guilt!
“Half of the people lie with their lips; the other half with their tears”
― Nassim Nicholas Taleb
What is Narcissistic Guilt-Tripping?
Narcissistic guilt-tripping happens when a narcissist tries to make you feel bad or ashamed so they can control you. They use your guilty feelings to get what they want.
Here’s how it works: The narcissist says or does things to make you feel like you’ve done something wrong. Even if you haven’t! They might bring up past mistakes, compare you to others, or act like a victim. The goal is to make you feel so guilty that you’ll do whatever they want to make up for it.
It’s a nasty mind game that leaves you feeling confused, ashamed, and desperate to please the narcissist. You end up walking on eggshells, trying not to upset them. Meanwhile, the narcissist gets to call all the shots.
Guilt-tripping is just one of many dark arts narcissists use to mess with your head. But it’s an especially powerful one. Why? Because it taps into our natural desire to be good people and avoid hurting others. Narcissists twist that desire and use it against us.
“The refraining of freedom of speech from the governmental system can cause its citizens to turn into narcissists in their free time.”
― Mwanandeke Kindembo
The worst part? Narcissistic guilt-tripping can be hard to spot at first. The narcissist often acts like they care about you. They might even seem hurt or upset. But don’t be fooled – it’s all part of the act. Their goal is to make you feel bad so they can control you.
27 Sneaky Guilt Trips Narcissists Use
Narcissists have all kinds of tricks up their sleeves when it comes to guilt-tripping. Here are 27 common guilt trips narcissists use to control others:
- Making you feel like you owe them. The narcissist acts like you’re in debt to them for past favors or good deeds. They keep score and expect payback.
- Blowing small issues way out of proportion. A tiny mistake on your part becomes a huge betrayal in their eyes. They act deeply wounded over minor things.
- Playing the victim if you don’t obey. When you don’t do what they want, they sulk and act hurt. They make you feel mean for “letting them down.”
- Threatening to withdraw love or support. The narcissist hints they’ll stop caring about you if you don’t comply. This makes you scared to upset them.
- Bringing up sacrifices they’ve made for you. They remind you of all they’ve done, making you feel ungrateful if you don’t give in to their demands.
- Always making you the bad guy. No matter what happens, they twist it so you’re in the wrong. You end up apologizing even when it’s not your fault.
- Dredging up your past mistakes. The narcissist never lets you forget your flaws or slip-ups. They use your history against you.
- Comparing you negatively to others. They point out how other people treat them better than you do. This makes you feel inadequate.
- Making you feel selfish for having needs. If you try to take care of yourself, they act like you’re neglecting them. Your needs don’t matter.
- Demanding unreasonable things. They ask for too much, then guilt you when you can’t deliver. You feel like you’re always falling short.
- Blaming you for their shortcomings. When the narcissist fails or messes up, they make it your fault somehow. You feel responsible for their problems.
- Accusing you of being ungrateful. No matter how much you do, it’s never enough. They act like you don’t appreciate them.
- Turning your anger into misplaced guilt. When you’re justifiably upset, they flip it around. Suddenly you feel guilty for being angry.
- Sulking or giving the silent treatment. They punish you by withdrawing. You end up begging for forgiveness just to end the cold shoulder.
- Treating you badly, then saying it proves you don’t care. Their mistreatment becomes evidence of your failings in their eyes.
- Making you feel guilty for setting boundaries. When you try to create healthy limits, they act deeply hurt. Your boundaries become “rejection” in their eyes.
- Using holidays or special events to guilt trip. They ramp up the manipulation around important days, knowing you’ll feel extra pressure to make them happy.
- Bringing up past gifts or favors constantly. Nothing they do for you is ever forgotten. They expect endless gratitude and payback.
- Using guilt to pressure you into intimacy. They make you feel bad if you’re not in the mood for physical affection or sex.
- Making you feel guilty for not rescuing them. Their problems become your responsibility. If you don’t fix everything, you’ve failed them.
- Using guilt so you won’t leave the relationship. As you pull away, they lay on the guilt to keep you trapped. They act like you’d be heartless to go.
- Attacking your flaws when you disagree. Anytime you stand up to them, they bring up your faults to shut you down.
- Making you feel guilty for not reading their mind. They expect you to anticipate their needs perfectly. When you don’t, you’ve let them down.
- Accusing you of being selfish for needing space. If you ask for time alone, they act deeply wounded. Your need for space becomes a personal attack in their eyes.
- Guilting you for not “being there” enough. No matter how much support you give, it’s never enough. They always needed you more.
- Using guilt to isolate you from others. They make you feel bad for spending time with friends or family. Your other relationships are a threat to them.
- Making you responsible for their emotions. Their happiness (or lack of it) is always your fault. You feel constant pressure to manage their moods.
Phew! That’s a lot of manipulation tactics. And sadly, it’s not even a full list. Narcissists are endlessly creative when it comes to making others feel guilty.
“Narcissists are consumed with maintaining a shallow false self to others. They’re emotionally crippled souls that are addicted to attention. Because of this they use a multitude of games, in order to receive adoration. Sadly, they are the most ungodly of God’s creations because they don’t show remorse for their actions, take steps to make amends or have empathy for others. They are morally bankrupt.”
― Shannon L. Alder
Why Guilt-Tripping Can Be Hard to Spot
Guilt-tripping isn’t always obvious. In fact, narcissists are experts at making their manipulation seem caring or concerned. This sneakiness is what makes narcissistic guilt-tripping so dangerous.
At first, the narcissist’s guilt trips might look like normal relationship stuff. They might say things like “I just want us to be close” or “I worry about you.” It can seem sweet that they care so much.
But over time, a pattern emerges. The narcissist’s “concern” always leads to you feeling bad about yourself. Their “love” comes with strings attached. You start to feel guilty all the time, even when you haven’t done anything wrong.
“I raised the mystics up to the ladder of knowledge, in order to illustrate that one cannot be a narcissist when you are being praised by others.”
― Mwanandeke Kindembo
Here’s why narcissistic guilt-tripping can be so hard to spot:
- It often starts subtle. The guilt trips may be small at first. The narcissist tests the waters to see what works on you.
- It’s mixed with affection. The narcissist doesn’t guilt-trip all the time. They also show love and care sometimes. This keeps you off balance.
- It plays on your empathy. If you’re a caring person, you naturally want to avoid hurting others. The narcissist uses this against you.
- It seems reasonable at first. The narcissist’s requests might seem normal in the beginning. It’s only over time that they become excessive.
- You’re emotionally invested. When you care about someone, it’s hard to see their bad behavior clearly. You want to believe the best about them.
- The narcissist denies it. If you confront them, they’ll insist they’re not guilt-tripping you. They might even act hurt that you’d accuse them of manipulation.
- It becomes your “normal.” After a while, you get used to feeling guilty all the time. It starts to feel like that’s just how relationships work.
These factors make it tricky to spot narcissistic guilt-tripping. Many people don’t realize what’s happening until they’re deep in a toxic relationship.
How Guilt-Tripping Benefits the Narcissist
Why do narcissists love guilt-tripping so much? Simple – it works. Guilt is a powerful emotion that can make people do all sorts of things they wouldn’t normally do. For a narcissist, guilt-tripping is like having a remote control for other people’s behavior.
“No other being is lesser human than the one who thinks of others as such.”
― Abhijit Naskar
Here are some ways guilt-tripping benefits the narcissist:
1. It gives them control over the relationship.
When you feel guilty, you’re more likely to do what the narcissist wants. You might agree to things you’re not comfortable with or put their needs before your own. This gives the narcissist power to steer the relationship however they like.
2. It lets them dodge blame.
Narcissists hate taking responsibility for their actions. Guilt-tripping is a great way to flip the script. Instead of owning up to their bad behavior, they make you feel guilty for being upset about it. Suddenly, you’re the one apologizing!
3. It forces people-pleasing behavior.
The more guilty you feel, the harder you’ll try to make the narcissist happy. You might exhaust yourself trying to win their approval. Meanwhile, the narcissist gets to sit back and enjoy all your efforts.
4. It boosts their ego.
Making others feel bad about themselves makes narcissists feel powerful and important. Your guilt becomes proof of their specialness in their twisted logic.
“Survivors have trouble communicating and may experience social anxiety and agoraphobia, the fear of open space and crowded places. The feeling of isolation stemming from the days of a relationship persists and people who dealt with a narcissist feel too vulnerable to expose themselves to the outer world, which is often followed by a state of paranoia and beliefs that people are evil and want to cause us harm. It is like a constant state of fight or flight.”
― Theresa J. Covert, The Covert Narcissist: Recognizing the Most Dangerous Subtle Form of Narcissism and Recovering from Emotionally Abusive Relationships
5. It keeps you off balance.
When you’re always worried about upsetting the narcissist, you can’t think clearly. You’re too busy managing their emotions to notice how unhealthy the relationship is.
6. It creates a trauma bond.
Constant guilt-tripping can create a strong emotional attachment, even in a toxic relationship. You get hooked on the cycle of guilt and approval from the narcissist.
7. It isolates you from others.
Guilt-tripping often involves making you feel bad about other relationships. This can cut you off from friends and family who might support you.
8. It gives them a scapegoat.
By making you feel responsible for everything, the narcissist never has to deal with their own issues. You become the “problem” that needs fixing, not them.
As you can see, guilt-tripping is a powerful tool for narcissists. It allows them to manipulate and control others without having to change their own bad behavior.
Signs You’re Being Guilt-Tripped
How do you know if you’re being guilt-tripped by a narcissist? It’s not always easy to tell, especially if you’re in the thick of it. But there are some clear signs to watch out for.
Here are some red flags that suggest you might be dealing with narcissistic guilt-tripping:
- You feel responsible for the narcissist’s emotions. Their happiness (or lack of it) always seems to be your job.
- You apologize constantly, even for small things. You find yourself saying sorry all the time, often for stuff that’s not your fault.
- The narcissist makes vague accusations. They say things like “You never care about me” without giving specific examples.
- Conversations often turn to the narcissist’s hurt feelings. No matter what you’re discussing, it becomes about how you’ve upset them.
- You feel anxious about disappointing the narcissist. You’re always worried about how they’ll react to things.
- The narcissist gives you the silent treatment when upset. They punish you by withdrawing affection or communication.
- Any disagreement becomes about your failings. If you stand up for yourself, they bring up your flaws or past mistakes.
- The narcissist reminds you of everything they’ve done for you. They act like you owe them for past favors or sacrifices.
- You feel guilty even when you know you shouldn’t. Deep down, you know you haven’t done anything wrong, but you still feel bad.
- Your needs always come second to theirs. Anytime you try to take care of yourself, they make you feel selfish.
- They compare you negatively to others. The narcissist points out how other people treat them better than you do.
- You walk on eggshells to avoid upsetting them. You’re always watching what you say and do, afraid of triggering their anger or disappointment.
- They twist your words to make you sound bad. Even when you try to explain yourself, they find a way to make you the villain.
- You feel drained after spending time with them. Interactions with the narcissist leave you feeling emotionally exhausted.
If several of these signs sound familiar, you might be caught in a narcissist’s guilt trap. It’s a manipulative game they play to keep you under their control.
“So often victims end up unnecessarily prolonging their abuse because they buy into the notion that their abuser must be coming from a wounded place and that only patient love and tolerance (and lots of misguided therapy) will help them heal.”
― George K. Simon
How to Respond to Narcissistic Guilt-Tripping
Dealing with a guilt-tripping narcissist isn’t easy. Their manipulation can leave you feeling confused, ashamed, and powerless. But you don’t have to stay stuck in their toxic game. Here are some strategies to help you respond to narcissistic guilt-tripping:
1. Stay calm and don’t get defensive.
Guilt-tripping often triggers a strong emotional response. You might feel angry, hurt, or desperate to explain yourself. But getting upset only feeds into the narcissist’s game. Try to stay calm and composed. Remember, you don’t need to justify yourself to them.
2. Use the “broken record” technique.
When the narcissist tries to guilt-trip you, calmly repeat your stance over and over. Don’t get drawn into arguments or explanations. Just state your position clearly and firmly. For example: “I’m not available this weekend, and that’s my final decision.”
3. Refuse to accept blame or apologize unnecessarily.
If the narcissist tries to make you feel guilty for something that’s not your fault, don’t take the bait. You don’t need to apologize for things you didn’t do wrong. Stand your ground and trust your own judgment.
4. Set clear boundaries and stick to them.
Let the narcissist know which behaviors you won’t tolerate. Be specific about what you will and won’t do. For instance: “I won’t discuss this further if you continue to insult me.” Then follow through if they cross that line.
5. Use “I” statements to express your feelings.
Instead of accusing or blaming, focus on your own emotions and needs. Say things like “I feel hurt when you say that” or “I need time for myself.” This makes it harder for the narcissist to twist your words.
6. Recognize and name the guilt-tripping.
Sometimes, simply calling out the behavior can be powerful. You might say, “It seems like you’re trying to make me feel guilty right now. That’s not okay.” This shows you’re aware of their tactics.
7. Don’t JADE (Justify, Argue, Defend, Explain).
Narcissists often use guilt-tripping to draw you into lengthy, draining discussions. Avoid the temptation to justify your actions or decisions. Keep your responses brief and to the point.
8. Practice self-compassion.
Guilt-tripping can take a toll on your self-esteem. Be kind to yourself. Remind yourself that you’re doing your best and that you don’t deserve to be manipulated.
9. Seek support from others.
Talk to trusted friends or family about what you’re experiencing. Sometimes an outside perspective can help you see the situation more clearly. Consider joining a support group for people dealing with narcissistic abuse.
10. Consider limiting contact.
If the guilt-tripping continues despite your efforts, you might need to create some distance. This could mean setting stricter boundaries or even going low or no contact if the relationship is too toxic.
“When we meet and fall into the gravitational pull of a narcissist, we are entering a significant life lesson that involves learning how to create boundaries, self-respect, and resilience. Through trial and error (and a lot of pain), our connection with narcissists teaches us the necessary lessons we need to become mature empaths.”
― Mateo Sol
The Emotional Toll of Narcissistic Guilt-Tripping
Constant guilt-tripping can have serious effects on your mental and emotional health. It’s a form of emotional abuse that can leave deep scars. Here’s how narcissistic guilt-tripping might be affecting you:
- Low self-esteem: When someone constantly makes you feel bad about yourself, it’s hard to maintain a positive self-image. You might start to believe you’re selfish, inadequate, or unworthy of love.
- Anxiety and depression: The constant pressure to please the narcissist can lead to chronic stress, anxiety, and depression. You might feel hopeless or trapped.
- Difficulty trusting others: After dealing with a manipulative narcissist, it can be hard to trust people’s motives. You might become overly suspicious or withdraw from relationships.
- Chronic guilt and shame: Even when you’re not with the narcissist, you might feel guilty all the time. Normal actions like taking care of yourself can trigger intense shame.
- Indecisiveness: When you’re used to being criticized for your choices, making decisions becomes scary. You might struggle with even small choices, fearing you’ll do the wrong thing.
- Loss of identity: Constantly putting the narcissist’s needs first can make you lose touch with your own wants and needs. You might not even know who you are anymore.
- Physical symptoms: Emotional stress can show up in your body. You might experience headaches, digestive issues, or other health problems.
- Exhaustion: Dealing with guilt-tripping is emotionally draining. You might feel tired all the time, no matter how much you rest.
When Guilt-Tripping Meets Gaslighting
Narcissists often combine guilt-tripping with other manipulation tactics. One of the most common and damaging combinations is guilt-tripping plus gaslighting.
Gaslighting is when someone makes you question your own reality. They deny things that happened or twist your words to make you doubt yourself. When paired with guilt-tripping, it’s an especially toxic mix.
Here’s how guilt-tripping and gaslighting often work together:
- The narcissist guilt-trips you: They make you feel bad about something, real or imagined.
- You try to defend yourself: You explain your side or point out that you haven’t done anything wrong.
- The narcissist denies the guilt-trip: They claim they never said those things or that you’re misunderstanding them.
- They flip it around on you: Suddenly, you’re the one causing problems by being “too sensitive” or “always making things up.”
- You end up feeling guilty AND crazy: Not only do you feel bad about the original issue, but now you’re also questioning your own perception of reality.
This one-two punch of guilt-tripping and gaslighting can leave you feeling completely lost and powerless. You start to doubt everything – your memories, your feelings, your right to have needs and boundaries.
“A narcissist, on the other hand, is the exact opposite of an empath. Emotionally, narcissists are like brick walls who see and hear others but fail to understand or relate to them. As a result of their emotional shallowness, narcissists are essentially devoid of all empathy or compassion for other people. Lacking empathy, a narcissist is a very destructive and dangerous person to be around.”
― Mateo Sol
How Narcissists Weaponize Your Conscience
One of the cruelest things about narcissistic guilt-tripping is how it turns your own goodness against you. Narcissists are experts at weaponizing your conscience to control you.
Here’s how it works:
- They appeal to your sense of right and wrong: Narcissists know that good people want to do the right thing. They use this against you, framing their demands as moral obligations.
- They twist your empathy: If you’re a caring person, you naturally want to avoid hurting others. The narcissist paints themselves as the victim, making you feel guilty for any perceived slight.
- They play on your loyalty: If you value being loyal and keeping your word, the narcissist will use this to guilt you into sticking around, even in a toxic situation.
- They use your past against you: If you’ve made mistakes (and who hasn’t?), the narcissist brings these up to make you feel like you owe them or don’t deserve better treatment.
- They appeal to your desire to be a good person: The narcissist might say things like, “A real friend would do this” or “If you really loved me, you’d understand.” This makes you feel like you’re failing as a person if you don’t comply.
Are You Trapped in a Narcissist’s Guilt Web?
Sometimes, it can be hard to tell if you’re dealing with normal relationship guilt or if you’re caught in a narcissist’s manipulation. Here are some signs you might be trapped in a narcissist’s guilt web:
- You feel guilty all the time, even when you haven’t done anything wrong.
- Your needs always come second (or last) to the narcissist’s demands.
- You’re afraid to say no or set boundaries because of how the narcissist will react.
- You often feel confused about what’s real and what’s not in your relationship.
- You’re always trying to prove your love or loyalty to the narcissist.
- You feel responsible for the narcissist’s happiness and well-being.
- You’ve lost touch with your own wants and needs.
- You’re exhausted from trying to please the narcissist.
- You feel like you’re walking on eggshells all the time.
- The thought of leaving the relationship fills you with intense guilt and fear.
If several of these points sound familiar, you might be emotionally trapped by a narcissist’s guilt-tripping. It’s a scary place to be, but remember – you’re not alone, and there is a way out.
“Maybe, the lesson we can all learn from the inner sadness of a Narcissist is to see through our own fabrications, our own illusions so that we can be set free to be real once more.”
― Shannon L. Alder
From Love to Guilt: Navigating a Narcissist’s Emotional Minefield
Relationships with narcissists often follow a predictable pattern. At first, everything seems perfect. The narcissist showers you with love and attention. This phase is called “love bombing,” and it feels amazing.
But over time, things start to change. The love and praise get replaced with criticism and guilt trips. You find yourself constantly trying to get back to that honeymoon phase, but it always seems just out of reach.
Here’s how this journey from love to guilt typically unfolds:
- Love bombing: The narcissist makes you feel special and loved. They might say you’re their soulmate or the only one who understands them.
- Idealization: You’re put on a pedestal. The narcissist sees you as perfect and tells you so.
- Devaluation: Slowly, the narcissist starts to criticize you. Nothing you do is good enough anymore.
- Guilt-tripping: As the criticism increases, so do the guilt trips. You’re made to feel responsible for the narcissist’s unhappiness.
- Gaslighting: When you try to stand up for yourself, the narcissist denies their behavior or twists things around on you.
- Intermittent reinforcement: Just when you’re ready to give up, the narcissist gives you a taste of that early love and approval. This keeps you hooked, always hoping things will get better.
- Trauma bonding: The cycle of abuse and intermittent kindness creates a strong, unhealthy attachment to the narcissist.
The Guilt Trap: How Narcissists Keep You Coming Back for More
Even when you know a relationship with a narcissist is toxic, it can be incredibly hard to leave. That’s because narcissists are experts at setting guilt traps to keep you stuck.
Here are some common guilt traps narcissists use:
- The pity play: They act helpless without you, making you feel guilty for “abandoning” them.
- Threats of self-harm: They hint (or outright state) that they might hurt themselves if you leave.
- Bringing up shared history: They remind you of all the good times, making you feel guilty for wanting to end things.
- Playing the victim: They paint themselves as the wronged party, making you feel like the bad guy for wanting to leave.
- Guilt about children/family: If you have kids or shared family, they use this to make you feel guilty about breaking up the family.
- Financial guilt: They might claim they’ll be ruined without your support, even if it’s not true.
- Friend/family pressure: They turn mutual friends or family against you, increasing the guilt and social pressure to stay.
- Future-faking: They make grand promises about how things will be better in the future, making you feel guilty for giving up.
- Guilt about their past: They bring up their difficult childhood or past traumas to make you feel guilty for not standing by them.
“Most of the narcissists are geniuses and masters of Psychology. But they are using their knowledge to eradicate, rather than to help humanity.”
― Mwanandeke Kindembo
Final Thoughts: Breaking Free from Narcissistic Guilt
Dealing with a narcissist’s guilt trips is tough. It can leave you feeling confused, ashamed, and stuck. But there is hope. You can break free from this toxic cycle and reclaim your life.
Here are some key things to remember:
- You are not responsible for the narcissist’s feelings or behavior. Their happiness is not your job.
- Your needs and feelings matter. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.
- Guilt is a feeling, not a fact. Just because you feel guilty doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong.
- Healthy love doesn’t use guilt as a weapon. If someone constantly makes you feel bad about yourself, that’s not love – it’s manipulation.
- You have the right to set boundaries. It’s okay to say no and to take care of yourself.
- Healing takes time. Be patient and kind with yourself as you recover from narcissistic abuse.
Breaking free from narcissistic guilt-tripping is a journey. It might not be easy, but it’s worth it. You deserve relationships built on mutual respect and care, not manipulation and guilt.
“It is no accident that narcissists and altruists often have a magnetic attraction to one another. Can you see how perfect the fit is? The altruistic feels the need to selflessly serve others and this is just what the narcissist wants. Narcissists want to be worshipped and gratified in every way possible, and this is just what altruists offer, thinking it demonstrates their moral virtue.”
― Ellen Kenner
Remember, you’re stronger than you know. Every time you recognize a guilt trip for what it is, every time you stand up for yourself, you’re taking a step towards freedom. Keep going. Your future self will thank you.
If you’re struggling with narcissistic abuse, don’t hesitate to seek help. Talk to a therapist, join a support group, or reach out to trusted friends and family. You don’t have to face this alone.
You have the power to break free from the narcissist’s guilt trips. It starts with recognizing the manipulation for what it is. From there, you can start to build a life free from toxic guilt – a life where you’re free to be yourself and pursue your own happiness.
Remember: You deserve love that lifts you up, not guilt that tears you down. Don’t settle for less.
“Coverts do have a grandiose sense of self, are preoccupied with fantasies of power, require excessive admiration, but they hide these attributes so people will like and trust them. They know if they are obvious about their self-absorbed traits, people won’t like them. They believe they are “special” and entitled, but they know it would turn people off to let that be known. They know they must appear humble to be liked and revered. They know how to play people, how to charm them. They are master manipulators. They don’t have empathy but have learned how to act empathetically. They will look you in the eyes, making you feel special and heard, make sounds and give looks that tell you they care, but they really don’t. They mirror your emotions, so it seems like they have empathy. They have observed and learned how to appear to care. They thrive upon the attention of others. People who think or act as if they are amazing are their energy supply. They have people around them who adore them, respect them, revere them, see them as special and almost perfect, and in some cases seem to worship them.”
― Debbie Mirza, The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse
