“The narcissist is like a bucket with a hole in the bottom: No matter how much you put in, you can never fill it up. The phrase ‘I never feel like I am enough’ is the mantra of the person in the narcissistic relationship.”

“When an accusation is thrown at you that does not fit you… mentally flip it back on your partner. He is likely accusing you of what he is doing or feeling.”

“The emotional coldness can be confusing… you may find yourself spinning—and actually feeling as though you are ‘going crazy’—because the coldness of the response makes it even more difficult to regulate yourself.”

“Narcissists… barrel through life, using relationships and people as objects, tools, and folly… carelessness is cruel… the outcome is damage to other people’s well-being, hopes, aspirations, and lives.”

“Because of the narcissist’s tendency to blame… and engage in projection, they will often blame you for being unreliable and inconsistent, when it is in fact their moods that are all over the map.”

“The narcissistic relationship is like a riptide that pulls you back in even as you try to swim away… the highs and lows are why you swim out… the abusive behavior makes you want to swim away.”

“One of the great traps… narcissistic folks actually believe they are nice people. It’s part of their… delusional grandiosity, self-righteousness, and moral rectitude.”

“Narcissists do not tolerate anything that feels like abandonment. The reaction to narcissistic injury is typically narcissistic rage and revenge… Meet his behavior with dignified silence.”

“To any survivor… emotional, verbal, and psychological abuse will never be… part of the messy equation of a normal relationship… The traumatic highs and lows of being with a narcissist… are not the natural highs and lows of regular relationships.”

“Their manipulation is psychological and emotionally devastating… the brain circuitry for emotional and physical pain are one and the same… the effects of narcissistic abuse can be crippling and long-lasting, even resulting in symptoms of PTSD or Complex PTSD.”

“Narcissists gaslight you so you begin to gaslight yourself… Many of these partners engage in pathological lying and rewrite reality on a daily basis to suit their needs.”

“Narcissistic abusers first idealize their partners… Later, they will use your disclosure as ammunition and pick at your weak spots to regain a sense of psychological control.”

“The narcissist cultivated your need for… validation… Now, as they devalue you… Nothing can meet their high standards and everything wrong will be pointed out.”

“It is important to recognize that the narcissist constructs a false, dark alternate reality… The abuser enjoys employing gaslighting and projection techniques to rewrite the history of abuse and misplace all blame onto you.”

“So for those who think abuse survivors can simply logically process their situation and get out… think again… It usually takes a great deal of effort… for a survivor to become fully empowered to begin to heal from this form of trauma.”

“Psychopaths provide shallow praise and flattery only in order to gain trust… you are never allowed to express anything but positive praise for them.”

“Psychopaths… gaslight you into believing that your normal reactions to their abuse are the problem—not the abuse itself… you’re the abnormal one who is too sensitive, too critical.”

“Victims… experience a range of emotions… jealousy, neediness, rage, anxiety, and paranoia… They were carefully manufactured by the psychopath in order to make you question your own good nature.”

“You look back… able to see that every instance of abuse & neglect was calculated and intentional… the love of your life… had set you up for failure since the very beginning.”

“In the honeymoon phase… they groom you to become a constant source of positive energy… Once you fail to meet their rapidly shifting standards, you will be devalued and criticized.”

“Emotional abusers condition their victims to feel ashamed, inadequate, and unstable… they break down the target’s self-esteem through belittling, teasing, and manufactured jealousy.”

“Playing the victim role: Manipulator portrays him- or herself as a victim… to gain pity… Caring and conscientious people… the manipulator often finds it easy to play on sympathy to get cooperation.”

“If you’re dealing with a person who… tries to make you feel guilty… you can assume you’re dealing with a person who… is covertly aggressive.”

“Manipulators know that if they’re above-board in their aggression, they’ll encounter resistance… they’re adept at fighting unscrupulously yet surreptitiously.”

“ACCEPT NO EXCUSES… If someone’s behavior is wrong or harmful, the rationale they offer is totally irrelevant… The ends never justify the means.”

“We’re more apt to doubt and blame ourselves for daring to believe what our gut tells us about our manipulator’s character.”

“The ‘losing battle’ manipulation victims often fight is trying to make the manipulator change… Fighting this losing battle inevitably breeds… depression.”

“Aggressive characters… deliberately play very fast and loose with the truth when they’re not flat out lying… carefully managing your impression of them and manipulating you through deception.”

“You press your internal mute button… If appropriate, you masterfully hold the narcissist accountable, or you move on… your distress now slides away like a fluffy omelet departs a well-prepared pan.”

“You may have heard the term ‘narcissistic injury’… Instead of appearing wounded, they will hurl the prickliest words at you, avoid you, or demand your applause… You may find yourself surrendering, offering an ‘I’m sorry’ of your own…”

“When he’s forced to face… feeling foolish… his sensitivity… may launch him into the tyrannical state of meanness typical of narcissists or cause him to disappear within his stonewalled, silent abyss.”

“Being with a narcissist means walking on eggshells, constantly trying to avoid triggering their volatile temperament.”

“Narcissists are like parasitic bugs that leech onto you… then when you are no longer useful, they discard you. It’s called the narcissistic abuse cycle.”

“Gaslighting is their stock and trade.”

“Narcissists lie and manipulate to create a false reality… They will insist you join them in their reality, and will split on you when this is challenged.”

“A narcissist is the last person to take responsibility… that responsibility… gets unfairly deflected onto you, forcing you to carry a growing burden that shouldn’t be yours.”

“Narcissists often accuse others of their own bad behavior… by saying they were either ‘doing the same thing you were doing,’ or you ‘made them do it,’ even when none of the accusations are true.”

“A narcissist is skilled at making false promises, giving you just enough hope to keep you hanging on, but never truly delivering on their word.”

“Being with a narcissist can erode your identity, as their constant need for admiration leaves little room for your own growth and self-expression.”

“Many narcissists exhibit strong sadistic qualities… you’ll see narcissists often smiling or smirking when they’re being cruel, because they are having fun hurting you.”

“Narcissists have a special skill for turning words around and using situations to their advantage… Be direct, brief, and stick to the facts… not allowing them to gaslight or manipulate you.”

“A narcissistic mother sees her daughter… as a reflection and extension of herself rather than as a separate person… the daughter is always scrambling to find the right way to respond.”

“Most damaging is that a narcissistic mother never approves of her daughter simply for being herself… This teaches the daughter that she is unworthy of love.”

“When children can’t rely on their parents to meet their needs, they cannot develop a sense of safety, trust, or confidence.”

“Boys seem to have a different kind of relationship with Mother… her brother or brothers were better liked and more favored… Daughters consistently report how hurtful this has been.”

“Each one of us is imbued with a deep yearning to live our own life… Yet the narcissistic mother puts pressure on her child to act and react to the world as she would.”

“They will often imagine non-existent criticism and will respond by shutting down and sulking or acting out in a rage… in his mind, you are either with him or against him.”

“I think narcissists look for people who shine very brightly… Once the ‘honeymoon is over’… they must destroy them to fulfill and protect their own ego.”

“This is a time of self-discovery… After years of emotional abuse at the hands of a narcissist, we tend to lose our identity… a time of self-reflection, self-acceptance and rebirth.”

“It is only by finding and healing these old, original traumas that the narcissist has been using against you that you can break out of the insane emotional prison he or she has trapped you in.”

“We… acquired… learned helplessness and powerlessness… causing us to hand over our power to abusers and to stay traumatised.”

“We are… moving away from the illusions and traumas that once trapped us unconsciously in narcissistic abuse.”

“In the narcissist’s world being accepted or cared for… is meaningless or even repellent… Narcissists damage and hurt… They are aware… but they do not care.”

“[Abusers] blame the world… for their defeats, misfortune, misconduct, and failures… ‘I misbehaved because I completely lost my temper.'”

“They… explode… or berate… Alternatively, they sulk (silent treatment)… These pendulum-like emotional swings make life with the narcissist exhausting.”

“The narcissist has to condition his human environment to refrain from expressing criticism… any… disagreement… throws him into frightful fits of temper and rage attacks.”

“Codependents… are stuck in a pattern of giving and sacrificing, without the possibility of ever receiving the same from their partner… their… learned helplessness… keeps them… with their narcissistic partner.”

“Due to unconscious, trauma-based psychological forces, codependents and pathological narcissists are almost always attracted to each other… The resulting relationship is mostly breakup resistant.”

“Most codependents are selfless… pathologically caring… whose altruism and good deeds are rarely reciprocated.”

“To varying degrees, all pathological narcissists are selfish, self-consumed, demanding, entitled, and controlling… Positive treatment results are rare for narcissists.”

“They cannot leave their narcissistic partner because their lack of self-esteem and self-respect makes them feel like they can do no better… Being alone… is too painful to bear.”

“Covert narcissists are masters of disguise… beloved and appreciated, but are secretly selfish, calculating, controlling, angry, and vindictive.”

“Narcissist abuse syndrome (NAS) is a chronic pattern of physical, emotional, and/or sexual abuse perpetrated by a pathological narcissist against… gaslit individuals.”

“Narcissists… carefully and methodically seek, and then groom, victims who are lonely and who lack self-confidence, self-esteem, and social supports.”

“Narcissist perpetrators have a ‘nose’ for codependent victims who are naturally oblivious to their scheming, manipulative and gaslighting ways.”

“Victims of narcissistic abuse are either unable to or believe they are unable to end the abuse… because of the uncertainty about the true dangerous nature of the abuser.”

“Codependency or Self-Love Deficit Disorder withdrawals make leaving a narcissist virtually impossible… pathological loneliness… emotionally incapacitates the would-be escapee.”

“Verbal abuse often leaves… scars… Moving From Confusion to Clarity After Narcissistic Abuse.”

“They are often arrogant, entitled, manipulative, and pathological liars… lack of insight and accountability can come across as bizarre, staggering, and even jaw-dropping.”

“The emotions of fear, obligation, guilt, and sympathy… are perhaps the most preyed upon… to get a person to comply.”

“Once this imbalance takes place, the relationship ceases to be healthy… the target is on edge… waiting for the next… radical change in temperament.”

“There is no healthy relationship possible with someone who lacks empathy, sincere remorse, honesty… or whose actions repeatedly harm you or others.”

“When I began speaking out… they kept telling me to ‘get over it’… I was abused and terrorized… for decades… I lost my voice and I nearly lost my mind.”

“The narcissistic family… everyone is rotating around the narcissist on continual high alert, with consistently elevated stress.”

“Cognitively they are adults, but emotionally they are toddlers. Would you trust a toddler to understand your feelings… or be a parent?”

“Rejected narcissists may fight… for child custody not because they want their children but as a way to hurt their ex… launch a calculated smear campaign.”

“Narcissists… habitually devalue and harshly reject those most close to them… something emotionally healthy people do not do.”

“Whatever harm the narcissist does, if you are her/his primary scapegoat s/he finds a reason—however convoluted—to hold you responsible.”

“constantly monitoring others for signs of distress… subordinate their own personal needs… and… become enmeshed in others’ feelings.”

“Reverse parenting… heightened emotional susceptibility… your psychological boundary strength was not sufficiently developed… less able to screen out… others’ emotions.”

“Being unable to initiate and maintain… relationships; being unable to say no and stick to it… nearly impossible to describe what their formative years were like.”

“Often Caretakers are very independent… when not in a relationship with a borderline or narcissist… It is almost as if the Caretaker lives in two different worlds.”

“The difficulty of being cutoff rather than being healed from caretaking is that you still feel… vulnerable to being… forced back into the Caretaker role again.”

“Don’t Lie, Pretend, or Deny the Truth to Your Children… denying their feelings… will be injurious… making them feel wrong, crazy, or unable to trust their own perceptions.”

“Borderlines and narcissists share a similar internal sense of low self-esteem, fear, anxiety, paranoia, and deep emotional pain from… ‘not feeling good enough.'”

“In relationships, narcissists often begin by idealizing their partner… Once the ‘fantasy’ phase subsides, narcissists begin to devalue their partners… manipulative and emotionally abusive behaviors…”

“They will do whatever it takes to get what they want… Narcissists tend to enjoy other people’s pain… Real remorse is not likely… because that would require… emotional awareness…”

“Narcissists are good at making their spouses question their worth… Narcissistic abuse is insidious… victims often need professional help to rebuild their self-worth…”

“Loving a narcissist often feels like pouring your heart into a bottomless pit… you may find yourself constantly giving, while they keep taking.”

“A narcissist’s love is like a mirage… emotionally draining and damaging… an imbalance and a lack of mutual respect.”

“A narcissist’s love is conditional and transactional, leaving you feeling empty and unworthy when their attention shifts.”

“A simple ‘I’m sorry’… for a narcissist, is like saying, ‘I am the worst human being on earth’… instead… they will hurl the prickliest words at you, avoid you, or demand your applause.”

“Remind yourself: You have a right to your disappointment… Recognize self-blame… It keeps you stuck in the wrong relationship, with someone who needs you to bury your needs.”

“Firm empathy is deeply caring… to work around their fears… guarantees they’ll live a life of fear… another path to narcissistic addiction.”

“‘Love bombing, devaluation, and discard’… The cycle of narcissistic abuse… keeps you on edge and doubting your reality.”

“Aggressive personalities… are usually about the business of conning and duping you… Their lying is so pervasive… they will lie even when the truth would do just fine.”

“Narcissists exhibit parasitic behavior, latching onto their victims and draining their emotional energy… When the victim is no longer useful… they discard them.”

“Being with a narcissist can feel one-sided… Your efforts… are met with indifference or self-serving responses.”

“A narcissist is the last person to take responsibility or accountability… your narcissistic partner will only continue adding to that pile rather than alleviate any amount of the burden.”

“Some partners in a relationship with a narcissist find it difficult to move on because they long for the romanticized ‘adoration phase.'”

“A narcissist’s love is like a mirage in the desert… It looks beautiful… but up close, it’s nothing but an illusion.”

“Covert Narcissists… are talented at pretending to be someone they are not… If people could see behind their charming… masks they wouldn’t be able to… manipulate their unsuspecting victims.”

“Victims of narcissistic abuse feel frozen… for fear of upsetting or disappointing friends and family.”

“Narcissists… carefully manage your impression of them… lying in subtle and sophisticated ways… almost impossible to count them all.”

“Normal ups and downs in a relationship don’t have abusive aspects… A non-narcissist… would not need to… gaslight/triangulate you constantly.”

“Start small by simply staying in touch with healthy people… put time with these folks ahead of… rescuing, fixing, and forgiving… narcissistic people in your life.”

“Moderate narcissist offers enough good days to keep you invested and enough bad days that hurt you and leave you utterly confused.”

“Narcissists are often attracted to individuals with free spirits and trusting natures… He literally fed off of my energy and emotions because he was incapable of his own.”

“Codependents confuse caretaking and sacrifice with loyalty and love… They pretend to enjoy the dance, but secretly harbor… anger, bitterness, and sadness.”

“Remind yourself… If you share your needs and feelings and it actually drives the person away, then you can’t be happy in the relationship.”

“Narcissists… will often smile or smirk when they’re being cruel, because they are having fun hurting you.”

“He may be engrossed in workaholism, drinking binges… not necessarily because he’s seeking attention, but… to avoid… aloneness and fragility… You’re expected to pander… regardless of the emotional costs to you.”

“In the desperate search for love… the daughter chooses not to pay attention to the red flags that may be waving.”

“Some days will be easier than others… in order to heal… you have to untangle and deprogram all the falsities they’ve ingrained in your mind.”

“Narcissists… accuse you of being negative when they are the most negative people in the world.”

“Victims… checkmate themselves by constantly trying to rationalize the abuser’s completely irrational behavior.”

“A narcissist’s love is conditional and transactional… Remember that true love doesn’t thrive in the shadow of manipulation.”

“Narcissists exhibit parasitic behavior… the victim often feels constantly criticized and manipulated.”

“Narcissists… maintain a grandiose exterior… chronically reliant on the opinions of others… (in a way, narcissists outsource their sense of self).”

“Stop Rewarding Bad Behavior… the best satisfaction would be to give them nothing but silence… If your narcissist did not appreciate your presence, why not give them your absence?”