Last updated on December 18th, 2024 at 03:36 am

• 1. The Allure of the Somatic Narcissist
• 1.1 Physical Perfection as Bait
• 1.2 The Art of Seduction
• 1.3 Love Bombing: The Initial Assault
• 1.4 Mirroring and Idealization
• 2. Establishing Control Through Manipulation
• 2.1 Gaslighting: Distorting Reality
• 2.2 Emotional Blackmail: The Guilt Trip
• 2.3 Intermittent Reinforcement: The Hot and Cold Game
• 2.4 Triangulation: Creating Jealousy and Insecurity
• 3. Maintaining Power Through Emotional Abuse
• 3.1 The Silent Treatment: Emotional Withdrawal as Punishment
• 3.2 Verbal Abuse: Undermining Self-Esteem
• 3.3 Projection: Deflecting Blame and Responsibility
• 3.4 Withholding Affection: The Carrot and Stick Approach
• 4. Isolating the Victim
• 4.1 Undermining Relationships with Family and Friends
• 4.2 Controlling Social Interactions
• 4.3 Financial Control: Creating Dependency
• 4.4 Digital Surveillance: Monitoring Communication
• 5. Maintaining the Facade: Image Management
• 5.1 The Public Persona: Charm Offensive
• 5.2 Smear Campaigns: Preemptive Character Assassination
• 5.3 Flying Monkeys: Recruiting Allies
• 5.4 Damage Control: Minimizing and Denying Abuse
• 6. The Cycle of Abuse: Keeping Victims Trapped
• 6.1 Trauma Bonding: The Addiction to Abuse
• 6.2 Hoovering: The False Promise of Change
• 6.3 Intermittent Reinforcement: The Gambling Effect
• Frequently Asked Questions
• What Are The Key Traits Of A Somatic Narcissist?
• How Does A Somatic Narcissist Use Love Bombing As A Control Tactic?
• What Is Gaslighting And How Do Somatic Narcissists Use It?
• How Does A Somatic Narcissist’s Obsession With Physical Appearance Affect Their Relationships?
• What Are The Signs Of Emotional Manipulation By A Somatic Narcissist?
• How Do Somatic Narcissists Use Triangulation To Control Their Partners?
• What Is The Silent Treatment And How Do Somatic Narcissists Use It As A Control Tactic?
• How Do Somatic Narcissists Exploit Their Partners’ Insecurities?
• What Role Does Jealousy Play In A Somatic Narcissist’s Control Tactics?
• How Do Somatic Narcissists Use Sex As A Means Of Control?
• What Is Love Bombing And How Do Somatic Narcissists Use It?
• How Do Somatic Narcissists Use Comparison As A Control Tactic?
• What Is Gaslighting And How Do Somatic Narcissists Use It To Control Their Partners?
• How Do Somatic Narcissists Use Intermittent Reinforcement To Control Their Partners?
• How Do Somatic Narcissists Use Financial Control As A Manipulation Tactic?

Did you know that approximately 1 in 20 people exhibit traits of narcissistic personality disorder? Among these, somatic narcissists stand out as particularly manipulative and controlling individuals. Their obsession with physical appearance and sexual prowess makes them dangerous predators in personal relationships.

Somatic narcissists employ a variety of cunning strategies to exert control over their partners and maintain their inflated sense of self-importance. From love bombing to triangulation, their playbook is filled with manipulative tactics designed to keep their victims off-balance and dependent.

Discover the somatic narcissist’s playbook and uncover the subtle yet powerful strategies they use to control and manipulate relationships for their personal gain.

1. The Allure of the Somatic Narcissist

Somatic narcissists are masters of first impressions, using their physical appearance and charm to draw potential victims into their web. Their initial tactics are designed to create an irresistible attraction that blinds targets to their true nature.

1.1 Physical Perfection as Bait

Somatic narcissists invest heavily in their physical appearance, often adhering to strict fitness regimens and fashionable dress codes. This focus on outward beauty serves as a powerful lure for unsuspecting targets.

They may spend hours at the gym, carefully curating their wardrobe, or even undergoing cosmetic procedures to maintain their ideal image. This dedication to physical perfection is not merely vanity – it’s a calculated strategy to attract admiration and potential partners.

1.2 The Art of Seduction

Beyond mere physical attraction, somatic narcissists are skilled seducers. They employ a range of techniques to create an intense emotional and physical connection with their targets.

These may include deep, prolonged eye contact, “accidental” physical touches, and carefully crafted compliments designed to make the target feel special and desired. Their goal is to create a sense of intimacy and connection that feels unparalleled.

1.3 Love Bombing: The Initial Assault

Once a target is identified, somatic narcissists often engage in a technique known as love bombing. This involves showering the target with excessive attention, affection, and gestures of love.

They may send constant text messages, surprise their target with lavish gifts, or make grand romantic gestures. This overwhelming display of affection is designed to quickly create a strong emotional bond and dependency.

1.4 Mirroring and Idealization

Somatic narcissists are adept at mirroring their target’s desires, interests, and values. They present themselves as the perfect partner, seemingly sharing every important trait and interest.

This mirroring is accompanied by idealization, where the narcissist places their target on a pedestal, showering them with praise and adoration. This combination creates an intoxicating sense of having found a soulmate or perfect match.

2. Establishing Control Through Manipulation

Once the initial phase of seduction is complete, somatic narcissists begin to implement more insidious control tactics. These strategies are designed to erode the target’s self-esteem and independence, creating a power imbalance in the relationship.

2.1 Gaslighting: Distorting Reality

Gaslighting is a cornerstone of narcissistic abuse, and somatic narcissists excel at this tactic. They consistently deny or distort reality, causing their victims to question their own perceptions and memories.

For example, a somatic narcissist might flirt openly with others, then vehemently deny it when confronted. They may claim their partner is “crazy” or “oversensitive” for noticing or being upset by their behavior.

2.2 Emotional Blackmail: The Guilt Trip

Emotional blackmail is another powerful tool in the somatic narcissist’s arsenal. They manipulate their partner’s emotions, often using guilt or fear to control their behavior.

They might threaten self-harm if their partner tries to leave, or claim that any boundaries or requests for change are “proof” that their partner doesn’t truly love them. This emotional manipulation keeps their victims trapped in a cycle of guilt and obligation.

2.3 Intermittent Reinforcement: The Hot and Cold Game

Somatic narcissists often employ a pattern of intermittent reinforcement, alternating between affection and coldness. This unpredictable behavior keeps their partners off-balance and constantly seeking approval.

One day, they might be loving and attentive, showering their partner with affection. The next, they may be distant, critical, or even cruel. This inconsistency creates an addictive cycle, with the victim constantly chasing the “good” moments.

2.4 Triangulation: Creating Jealousy and Insecurity

Triangulation is a particularly cruel tactic often employed by somatic narcissists. They introduce a third party into the dynamic, either real or imagined, to create jealousy and insecurity in their partner.

This might involve openly flirting with others, constantly comparing their partner unfavorably to exes or celebrities, or maintaining ambiguous relationships with “friends” that blur the lines of appropriateness.

3. Maintaining Power Through Emotional Abuse

As the relationship progresses, somatic narcissists intensify their emotional abuse tactics to maintain control and keep their partner in a state of confusion and dependence.

3.1 The Silent Treatment: Emotional Withdrawal as Punishment

The silent treatment is a favorite weapon of narcissists, and somatic narcissists are no exception. They use emotional withdrawal as a form of punishment and control.

When their partner does something they disapprove of, or simply to assert dominance, they may refuse to speak or acknowledge their partner for hours, days, or even weeks. This cruel tactic leaves the victim feeling anxious, confused, and desperate for reconciliation.

3.2 Verbal Abuse: Undermining Self-Esteem

Somatic narcissists often engage in verbal abuse to erode their partner’s self-esteem. This can range from subtle put-downs disguised as “jokes” to outright insults and name-calling.

They may criticize their partner’s appearance, intelligence, or abilities, often comparing them unfavorably to others. This constant barrage of negativity wears down the victim’s confidence and makes them more dependent on the narcissist for validation.

3.3 Projection: Deflecting Blame and Responsibility

Projection is a common defense mechanism used by narcissists. Somatic narcissists project their own flaws, insecurities, and negative behaviors onto their partners.

If they’re cheating, they’ll accuse their partner of infidelity. If they’re lying, they’ll become paranoid about their partner’s honesty. This tactic not only deflects blame but also keeps the victim constantly on the defensive.

3.4 Withholding Affection: The Carrot and Stick Approach

Somatic narcissists use physical affection as a form of currency in the relationship. They withhold or grant intimacy based on how well their partner is meeting their needs or demands.

This can create a dynamic where the victim feels they must “earn” affection through compliance and submission. The narcissist may use sex as a reward for good behavior or withhold it as punishment, creating an unhealthy power dynamic.

4. Isolating the Victim

Isolation is a key strategy employed by somatic narcissists to maintain control over their victims. By cutting off external support systems, they increase their partner’s dependence on them.

4.1 Undermining Relationships with Family and Friends

Somatic narcissists often work to damage their partner’s relationships with family and friends. They may speak ill of these individuals, plant seeds of doubt about their intentions, or create conflicts that drive a wedge between their partner and their support system.

They might accuse family members of being “toxic” or claim that friends are a bad influence. The goal is to position themselves as the only trustworthy person in their partner’s life.

4.2 Controlling Social Interactions

As the relationship progresses, somatic narcissists often exert increasing control over their partner’s social life. They may insist on accompanying their partner to all social events or discourage them from attending altogether.

They might become angry or sullen when their partner spends time with others, creating a situation where it’s easier for the victim to avoid social interactions altogether rather than deal with the narcissist’s reactions.

4.3 Financial Control: Creating Dependency

Many somatic narcissists seek to control their partner’s finances as a means of creating dependency. They may discourage their partner from working, insist on managing all the money, or create situations where their partner becomes financially indebted to them.

This financial control makes it much more difficult for the victim to leave the relationship, as they may feel they have no resources of their own to fall back on.

4.4 Digital Surveillance: Monitoring Communication

In the digital age, somatic narcissists often extend their control to their partner’s online activities. They may demand passwords to email and social media accounts, check phone records, or use tracking apps to monitor their partner’s movements.

This invasion of privacy is often justified as “concern” or “protecting the relationship,” but it’s really about maintaining control and feeding the narcissist’s need for information and power.

5. Maintaining the Facade: Image Management

Somatic narcissists are obsessed with maintaining a positive public image. They employ various strategies to ensure that others see them in the best possible light, often at the expense of their partner.

5.1 The Public Persona: Charm Offensive

In public, somatic narcissists often present a charismatic, charming persona that’s vastly different from their private behavior. They may be the life of the party, showering attention on others and appearing to be the perfect partner.

This stark contrast between public and private behavior can be confusing and isolating for their partner, who may feel that no one would believe the truth about the narcissist’s abusive behavior.

5.2 Smear Campaigns: Preemptive Character Assassination

If a somatic narcissist senses that their partner might leave or expose their true nature, they often launch smear campaigns. These involve spreading lies and half-truths about their partner to mutual friends, family, or even colleagues.

The goal is to discredit the victim before they can speak out, ensuring that others are less likely to believe any accusations of abuse or mistreatment.

5.3 Flying Monkeys: Recruiting Allies

Somatic narcissists often recruit flying monkeys – individuals who, wittingly or unwittingly, help the narcissist in their campaign of abuse and control.

These might be friends, family members, or even professionals who have been charmed or manipulated by the narcissist. They may pressure the victim to reconcile, minimize the abuse, or even participate in the smear campaign.

5.4 Damage Control: Minimizing and Denying Abuse

When confronted with evidence of their abusive behavior, somatic narcissists engage in extensive damage control. They may minimize their actions, claiming that their partner is overreacting or misinterpreting events.

They might also flatly deny that any abuse occurred, gaslighting their partner and any witnesses. In some cases, they may offer insincere apologies or grand gestures of remorse, only to revert to abusive behavior once the crisis has passed.

6. The Cycle of Abuse: Keeping Victims Trapped

Somatic narcissists often keep their victims trapped in a cycle of abuse, using a combination of tactics to prevent them from leaving or seeking help.

6.1 Trauma Bonding: The Addiction to Abuse

Trauma bonding is a psychological phenomenon where victims become emotionally attached to their abusers. Somatic narcissists create this bond through the cycle of abuse and reconciliation.

The intense highs of the “good times” followed by the lows of abuse create a biochemical addiction in the brain, making it extremely difficult for victims to leave the relationship.

6.2 Hoovering: The False Promise of Change

When victims attempt to leave or establish boundaries, somatic narcissists often employ a tactic known as hoovering. This involves making grand promises of change, showering the victim with affection, or playing on their sympathy.

They might claim they’ve seen the error of their ways, promise to seek therapy, or even threaten self-harm if the victim leaves. This tactic is designed to suck the victim back into the relationship, much like a vacuum (hence the term “hoovering”).

6.3 Intermittent Reinforcement: The Gambling Effect

Somatic narcissists use intermittent reinforcement to keep their victims hoping for positive change. By occasionally providing affection, validation, or seemingly genuine remorse, they create a “gambling effect” in their partner’s mind.



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Frequently Asked Questions

What Are The Key Traits Of A Somatic Narcissist?

Somatic narcissists are individuals with narcissistic personality disorder who primarily derive their sense of self-worth from their physical appearance and sexual prowess. According to Psychology Today, these individuals are obsessed with their bodies and use their physical attributes as a means of gaining admiration and control over others. They often engage in excessive grooming, exercise, and may even resort to cosmetic procedures to maintain their appearance.

Somatic narcissists also tend to be highly sexual, using their sexuality as a tool for manipulation and control in relationships. Their lack of empathy and constant need for validation can lead to significant emotional harm to those around them. This combination of traits makes them particularly adept at exploiting others for their own gain and validation.

How Does A Somatic Narcissist Use Love Bombing As A Control Tactic?

Love bombing is a manipulative strategy frequently employed by somatic narcissists to gain control over their partners. Healthline explains that this tactic involves overwhelming the target with excessive affection, attention, and promises of devotion early in the relationship. The somatic narcissist may shower their partner with compliments about their physical appearance, lavish gifts, and constant communication.

This intense display of affection is designed to create a strong emotional bond and dependency. However, once the narcissist feels they have secured control, they often withdraw this affection abruptly, leaving their partner confused and desperate to regain the initial level of attention. This cycle of idealization and devaluation is a key aspect of narcissistic abuse, creating an emotional rollercoaster for the victim.

What Is Gaslighting And How Do Somatic Narcissists Use It?

Gaslighting is a psychological manipulation tactic commonly used by somatic narcissists to maintain control over their victims. The National Domestic Violence Hotline defines gaslighting as a form of emotional abuse where the abuser makes the victim question their own reality. In the context of somatic narcissism, this might involve denying or twisting events related to their physical appearance or sexual behavior.

For example, a somatic narcissist might flirt openly with others but then accuse their partner of being “crazy” or “insecure” when confronted about it. They may also manipulate situations to make their partner doubt their own attractiveness or desirability. This constant undermining of the victim’s perceptions can lead to severe psychological distress, eroding self-esteem and making it difficult for the victim to trust their own judgment.

How Does A Somatic Narcissist’s Obsession With Physical Appearance Affect Their Relationships?

A somatic narcissist’s obsession with physical appearance can have profound impacts on their relationships. Verywell Mind explains that this fixation often leads to a superficial approach to relationships, where the narcissist values their partner primarily for their physical attributes or as a trophy to enhance their own status. This can result in emotional neglect, as the narcissist may be more concerned with maintaining their own appearance than nurturing emotional intimacy.

Partners of somatic narcissists may feel constant pressure to meet unrealistic beauty standards, leading to insecurity and self-esteem issues. Additionally, the narcissist’s preoccupation with their own appearance can lead to jealousy, controlling behavior, and even infidelity if they feel their partner is not adequately affirming their attractiveness or if they find someone they perceive as more physically appealing.

What Are The Signs Of Emotional Manipulation By A Somatic Narcissist?

Emotional manipulation is a cornerstone of the somatic narcissist’s control tactics. PsychCentral outlines several signs of this manipulation. One common tactic is the use of guilt-tripping, where the narcissist may make their partner feel responsible for their emotional state or physical appearance. They might say things like, “If you really loved me, you’d want me to look my best,” to justify excessive spending on appearance-related items.

Another sign is the constant need for validation, where the narcissist demands constant praise and attention for their looks or sexual performance. Emotional blackmail is also common, with threats of abandonment or infidelity if their partner doesn’t meet their demands. The narcissist may also engage in comparison, subtly or overtly comparing their partner unfavorably to others in terms of physical appearance. These manipulative behaviors are designed to keep the partner off-balance and maintain the narcissist’s control in the relationship.

How Do Somatic Narcissists Use Triangulation To Control Their Partners?

Triangulation is a manipulative tactic frequently employed by somatic narcissists to maintain control and create insecurity in their relationships. Psych2Go explains that this strategy involves introducing a third party into the dynamic between the narcissist and their partner. In the context of somatic narcissism, this often takes the form of flirting with others or constantly comparing their partner’s appearance to that of others.

The narcissist might openly admire someone else’s physical attributes in front of their partner or talk about past sexual conquests. This behavior is designed to make their partner feel insecure and compete for the narcissist’s attention. The third party doesn’t necessarily need to be a real person; it could be an ex-partner, a celebrity, or even an idealized version of beauty that the narcissist constantly references. The goal is to keep their partner in a state of anxiety and emotional turmoil, making them more susceptible to manipulation and control.

What Is The Silent Treatment And How Do Somatic Narcissists Use It As A Control Tactic?

The silent treatment is a form of emotional abuse that somatic narcissists often employ to exert control over their partners. Good Therapy describes it as a refusal to communicate or acknowledge the other person, often in response to a perceived slight or disagreement. In the context of somatic narcissism, this tactic might be used when the narcissist feels their physical appearance or sexual prowess has been questioned or not sufficiently praised.

For example, if their partner doesn’t respond enthusiastically enough to a new outfit or haircut, the narcissist might withdraw all communication as punishment. This silent treatment can last for hours, days, or even weeks, causing significant emotional distress to the partner. The sudden withdrawal of attention and affection is particularly jarring given the somatic narcissist’s usual focus on physical and sexual interactions. This tactic is designed to make the partner feel anxious, guilty, and desperate to regain the narcissist’s approval, reinforcing the narcissist’s control over the relationship.

How Do Somatic Narcissists Exploit Their Partners’ Insecurities?

Somatic narcissists are adept at identifying and exploiting their partners’ insecurities, particularly those related to physical appearance and sexual desirability. Psychology Today explains that this exploitation is a key part of their control strategy. The narcissist may initially shower their partner with compliments about their appearance, creating a sense of validation and dependency. However, they will then subtly or overtly criticize these same attributes, triggering feelings of inadequacy.

For example, they might suggest their partner should lose weight, dress differently, or change their hairstyle. These comments are often framed as “helpful suggestions” but are designed to undermine self-esteem. The narcissist may also compare their partner unfavorably to others, highlighting perceived flaws or shortcomings. By keeping their partner in a constant state of insecurity about their appearance and desirability, the somatic narcissist maintains control and ensures their partner remains dependent on their validation.

What Role Does Jealousy Play In A Somatic Narcissist’s Control Tactics?

Jealousy plays a significant role in a somatic narcissist’s arsenal of control tactics. Healthline explains that narcissistic jealousy is often intense and irrational, stemming from the narcissist’s deep-seated insecurities and fear of abandonment. In the case of somatic narcissists, this jealousy often manifests in relation to physical appearance and sexual attention. They may become extremely possessive, monitoring their partner’s interactions with others and reacting with anger or punishment if they perceive any threat to their dominance.

Paradoxically, while demanding complete fidelity and attention from their partner, somatic narcissists often engage in flirtatious or even unfaithful behavior themselves. This double standard is another form of control, keeping their partner off-balance and insecure. The narcissist may also use jealousy proactively, intentionally making their partner jealous by flirting with others or talking about past conquests. This behavior is designed to keep their partner constantly striving to prove their love and devotion, further cementing the narcissist’s control.

How Do Somatic Narcissists Use Sex As A Means Of Control?

Somatic narcissists often weaponize sex as a powerful tool for control in their relationships. PsychCentral explains that for these individuals, sex is not about mutual pleasure or intimacy, but rather about power, validation, and manipulation. They may use their sexual prowess to initially attract and hook their partners, showering them with intense sexual attention. However, once they feel they have control, they often begin to withhold sex as a form of punishment or manipulation.

This can involve suddenly becoming cold or disinterested, criticizing their partner’s sexual performance, or threatening infidelity. Conversely, they may also use sex as a way to “make up” after conflicts, even if the underlying issues haven’t been resolved. This creates a confusing dynamic where sex becomes intertwined with conflict resolution. Some somatic narcissists may also push their partners into uncomfortable sexual situations, using guilt or coercion to get their way. The goal is always to maintain control and keep their partner off-balance and dependent on their approval.

What Is Love Bombing And How Do Somatic Narcissists Use It?

Love bombing is a manipulative tactic frequently employed by somatic narcissists, especially in the early stages of a relationship. Psychology Today describes love bombing as an overwhelming display of affection, attention, and adoration designed to quickly create a strong emotional bond. In the context of somatic narcissism, this often involves intense focus on physical and sexual attraction.

The narcissist may shower their target with compliments about their appearance, send constant messages expressing desire, and initiate frequent sexual encounters. They might also lavish their partner with gifts related to appearance, such as expensive clothing or jewelry. This intense attention is intoxicating and creates a strong attachment. However, it’s not sustainable and is often followed by a sharp withdrawal once the narcissist feels they have secured control. This sudden shift leaves the partner confused and desperate to regain the initial level of attention, making them more susceptible to further manipulation.

How Do Somatic Narcissists Use Comparison As A Control Tactic?

Comparison is a potent tool in the somatic narcissist’s arsenal of control tactics. Verywell Mind explains that narcissists often use comparison to undermine their partner’s self-esteem and maintain a position of superiority. In the case of somatic narcissists, these comparisons frequently revolve around physical appearance and sexual desirability. They might openly admire the attributes of others in front of their partner, making comments like, “I wish you had a body like hers” or “He really knows how to dress well.”

These comparisons can be subtle or overt, but they’re always designed to make the partner feel inadequate. The narcissist might also compare their partner unfavorably to their exes or to celebrities, setting unrealistic standards of beauty or sexual performance. By constantly highlighting perceived shortcomings, the narcissist keeps their partner in a state of insecurity, always striving to meet impossible standards. This dynamic reinforces the narcissist’s control and makes it difficult for the partner to recognize their own worth independent of the narcissist’s validation.

What Is Gaslighting And How Do Somatic Narcissists Use It To Control Their Partners?

Gaslighting is a psychological manipulation tactic that somatic narcissists often employ to maintain control over their partners. The National Domestic Violence Hotline defines gaslighting as a form of emotional abuse where the abuser makes the victim question their own reality. In the context of somatic narcissism, this often involves denying or twisting events related to physical appearance or sexual behavior. For instance, a somatic narcissist might openly flirt with someone else, but when confronted, they might say, “You’re just being paranoid” or “You’re too sensitive.”

They might also manipulate situations to make their partner doubt their own attractiveness, saying things like, “No one else would find you desirable” or “You’re lucky I’m with you.” Over time, this constant undermining of the victim’s perceptions can lead to severe psychological distress. The victim may start to doubt their own judgment and become increasingly dependent on the narcissist’s version of reality. This erosion of self-trust makes it extremely difficult for the victim to recognize and escape the abusive dynamic.

How Do Somatic Narcissists Use Intermittent Reinforcement To Control Their Partners?

Intermittent reinforcement is a powerful psychological tool that somatic narcissists often use to keep their partners emotionally dependent. PsychCentral explains that this tactic involves unpredictably alternating between affection and neglect, praise and criticism. In the context of somatic narcissism, this might involve lavishing their partner with compliments about their appearance one day, then harshly criticizing them the next. They might be sexually attentive and passionate for a period, then suddenly become cold and distant.

This unpredictable pattern creates a trauma bond, where the partner becomes addicted to the narcissist’s rare moments of approval and affection. The partner learns to associate these moments of positivity with relief from anxiety, creating a powerful psychological dependency. This cycle is particularly effective because it plays on the partner’s hopes that the “good times” will return if they just try hard enough. As a result, the partner remains in a constant state of anxiety and hypervigilance, always trying to please the narcissist and regain their favor.

How Do Somatic Narcissists Use Financial Control As A Manipulation Tactic?

Financial control is another manipulation tactic that somatic narcissists may employ to maintain power over their partners. Verywell Mind explains that this form of abuse can be particularly insidious in relationships with somatic narcissists due to their focus on appearance and status. The narcissist might insist on controlling all financial decisions, particularly those related to appearance-enhancing expenses like clothing, gym memberships, or cosmetic procedures. They may lavish money on their own appearance while restricting their partner’s access to funds for similar purposes.

This creates a power imbalance where the partner becomes financially dependent on the narcissist for their basic needs and any appearance-related expenses. The narcissist might also use money to manipulate their partner’s behavior, offering financial rewards for compliance or threatening financial punishment for perceived slights. In some cases, they may push their partner into debt for appearance-related expenses, further trapping them in the relationship. This financial control serves to reinforce the narcissist’s dominance and make it more difficult for the partner to leave the relationship.